The Norwindians

Turns out we're not the only ones who just got back from Disneyland

2012-01-10T11:40:00.000-08:00

So here's the thing. I hate crowds. I really, really hate crowds. I hate crowds the way I hate sites like Groupon and Living Social. I like a bargain as much as the next person, but I hate the feeling of "OMG, I have to buy this oil change for my car and $20 worth of drinks at a bar that I have never been to rightthisveryminute before the deal passes me by!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!" It's why I will never, ever be caught dead at a Black Friday or even a Cyber Monday sale. Crowds and the frenzy of people searching for DEALSOMGDEALS!!!!! is not for me.

Crowds turn normally nice, lovely people into annoying, pushy people. Throw a huge mass of people into an amusement park and they are even more annoying a pushy. Everyone is clamoring to be the next person in line for a corn dog or running to the new roller coaster or to make sure their child is the next in line to have their picture taken with a giant mouse in red shorts.

We took our kids to Disneyland this past week. They did not return to school until yesterday and I read somewhere that the first week of January is apparently the third least busiest week at the happiest place on earth. Well, it is now clear to me that they meant the first week of January during a normal year, when all the kids are likely to be back in school. It turns out that lots of schools did not return until yesterday, not just mine. Hindsight.

Here is what Disneyland looked like while we were there.

We make the trek to Mickey-ville every three years and this was our third trip. Both other times we've pulled the kids out of school and the crowds have been non-existant. We wandered at our own pace through the park and had a great time. This was an entirely different experience. I turned into a person I really wasn't too fond of.

"OK kids, stay right next to me and don't get distracted"

"Seriously? You have to go to the bathroom again? Jeez."

"OK, you HAVE to hold my hand. You blend right in with 50 million other kids in Yoda t-shirts"

"If I buy you cotton candy, will you promise not to whine while we stand in line for 45 minutes to ride Space Mountain?"

"I said stay right next to me!!"

"Stop touching me, mommy needs some personal space."

"No seriously, stop touching me."

"Stay close to your dad and yes, you HAVE to hold his hand."

We learned some valuable lessons though, like how to make the most of Disneyland fast passes, green cotton candy is gross, you get more wet on Grizzly River Run than you do on Splash Mountain, one should never ride the Matterhorn if one really has to pee and has given birth to three children, pancakes shaped like Mickey just taste better and sometimes all you can do is just laugh and enjoy the ride.

Although our trip wasn't ideal, we made the best of it and according to my son, "made some family memories." The look on his face after riding Star Tours for the first time made it all worth it for me. No matter how anti-Disney you may be, they do know how to create magic -- for kids and adults.

A December to Remember

2011-12-27T20:33:00.001-08:00

Another Christmas come and gone. I was relaxed about the whole thing this year and it made all the difference. We enjoyed our usual traditions... cutting down a tree, making sugared almonds, watching Elf, listening to Christmas music non-stop. We skipped visiting Santa at the mall. At 9, 9 and 6 my kids had zero interest in standing in line to sit on a strangers lap and that was fine by me.

They got nearly everything on their Christmas lists which really wasn't that hard for me to accomplish. Their lists consisted of things like underwear, a giant Angry Bird, Twister, Clue in Paris, books, a wallet, earrings, charms, canvases and oil paints, Wipeout for the xbox, Slushy Magic. My girls wanted desks which I was planning on getting them anyway.

They were spoiled in the sense that they got everything they asked for, but not in an obnoxious way. My husband surprised them with Kindle Fires and a giant soccer goal for the backyard and they were sufficiently thrilled.

We had family over for our traditional curry Christmas dinner. It was perfect, the cousins played, the adults over ate and my house felt cozy and filled with happiness.

Per usual, when the whole thing was over I wished I had taken more pictures. I took a few on Christmas morning and one or two the rest of the day. Next year I'll just strap my camera to my neck and maybe that will remind me to document more of it all.

For now, here's a snippet of our December. Hope yours was cozy and happy no matter what you celebrated.

All I Want For Christmas

2011-12-09T23:34:00.000-08:00

If you are seeking holiday cheer, you've come to the right place. Below is a little gift from my family to yours.

Happy, Merry, Holly, Jolly, Joyous, Lovely, Bright Holidays to You!

My favorite part happens at about 3:44.

Holiday Cheer from Kirsten Patel on Vimeo.

I'm just going to start typing...

2011-11-21T21:59:00.000-08:00

Maybe I'll write about how much of a struggle it is to print things out at my house. We have a wireless printer, but it works about 2 times out of ten. It always seems to flash "communication error" at the most inopportune times, like this morning when I was trying to print out my daughter's book report.

Maybe I'll write about despite the fact that my sister has hosted Thanksgiving for the past eighteen years my mom has called me at least four times in the past week or so to ask me if we'll be at my house or my sister's for Thanksgiving.

Or I could write about my six year old son and his current obsession with Mad Libs. Every adjective is either farty or stinky and every noun is either New York or Kleenex.

I am so looking forward to Thanksgiving. I finished up my grocery shopping today and wrote out a schedule for the next three days of what I will cook and when. It might just be my favorite holiday and this is perhaps my favorite ABC Special of all time. Remember the days before DVRs and VCRs and it really was special when Charlie Brown was on TV?

I was going to write a post titled Words With Husbands. My husband and I used to play a lot of card games in our pre-kid days. He always won. Always. No matter what game we played, my wins were rare. The only games I can ever beat him at are air hockey, occasionally bowling and now Words With Friends. I've won four games in a row and it's killing him.

I recently found the blog Letters of Note, which contains all kinds of letters from all kinds of folks. The one below is from Roald Dahl, written to a girl who was inspired by The BFG to send him one of her dreams in a bottle. Isn't it lovely?

And with that, I'm off to bed.

Tomorrow my to do list has three items: 1) Answer emails 2) Buy black and grey tights and 3) Make pie dough.

Listen to This

2011-11-16T08:58:00.000-08:00

When I was a new mother of twins I was clearly in over my head. I had no idea what I was getting into. In between changing diapers, yelling at my husband, making bottles and endless, futile attempts to get my babies to sleep, I craved interaction with other women who were going through the same shock to their systems.

Eventually I got up the courage to attend a mothers of twins club meeting and as soon as I walked in the door I knew I had found my people. Nine years later I still cherish the friendships I made through that group. I've shared my darkest and brightest moments with those women and I love their children like they are my own.

Back then I had never heard of a blog. When my husband first started using the word I thought he was kidding. When he explained to me what it was, I thought it sounded like the most ridiculous thing I'd ever heard of. What kind of crazy person would tell their stories on the internet for any Joe Schmoe to read and comment on?! I have no time for that.

Meanwhile I was devouring books like Mothers Who Think, The Bitch in the House and Because I Said So. These women writers were sharing the stories that I was living. The labyrinth of emotions I was trying to navigate suddenly didn't seem so scary. By sharing their stories, these women I had never met made me feel validated and less alone in the land of motherhood. If I had known back then that there mothers out there typing out their stories daily on blogs, I would never have left my computer.

We all know how this story ends. Of course I started my own blog. I never tire of reading how other women approach motherhood. Every woman has a story to tell and every woman can learn something from hearing the stories of others.

Two years ago when Ann Imig put together the Listen to Your Mother show in Madison, Wisconsin, I followed along from my computer and wished I could attend. Then last year, Stacey and Elise put on a show in Spokane and again I followed along from my computer and wished I could attend.

So when Listen to Your Mother put out the call for new cities interested in producing a show, and Kim tentatively raised her hand, I thought maybe I can do more than follow along from my computer this year.

Which leads me to this. Scroll down and check out the Director/Producer team for the 2012 San Francisco show. I am so excited to be partnering with Kim and I am thrilled to be a part of bringing Listen to Your Mother to San Francisco.

"The Mission of each LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER production is to take the audience on a well-crafted journey that celebrates and validates mothering through giving voice to motherhood -- in all of its complexity, diversity and humor."

Email !!!!!!!!!!

2011-11-14T21:37:00.000-08:00

My kids have their own email addresses. My nine year olds send emails to their teachers and a few close friends and family. My six year old can't log on to his email without my help and he only emails me, my husband and his sisters. I log into their email accounts to check their messages much more often than they do.

If they didn't have email accounts I wouldn't be surprised by little gems like this in my inbox.

As I was tearing up reading the above message my daughter remarked, "you do realize he sent you little piles of poo right?" Yes, but he also sent me some martinis.

I also enjoy little exchanges like this one I had with my daughter tonight. We were sitting right next to each other on the couch while her brother was playing football on the xbox kinect. He was having a minor meltdown because the game was not going his way. Macy was writing "I will not be a whiner" 20 times because she had just finished a game on the xbox that involved a lot of whining because the game was not going her way.

You have to read from the bottom up since I could not figure out how to reverse the order.

One thing I've learned from my emailing with my children is that !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! runs in the family.

Karma

2011-11-12T23:05:00.000-08:00

Karma [kahr-muh] noun 1. action, seen as bringing upon oneself inevitable results, good or bad, either in this life or in a reincarnation.

This morning I drove about 20 minutes out to the coast so my daughters could take horseback riding lessons for an hour and half. Rather than drive all the way back home only to turn around and drive to pick them up, I found a small cafe where I could read or play Angry Birds and drink a cup of coffee.

There was a tall woman in line in front of me and she spent several seconds looking over the glass case full of pastries and reading the large chalkboard menu behind the counter. She wore a heavy black coat and a scowl that looked to me like her go-to facial expression. The girl behind the counter politely asked her if she was ready to order. With an insolent tone in her voice, the tall woman asked if they had any pizzas. It was about 10:45am. Another girl behind the counter said she would go check with the kitchen to see if the pizzas were ready yet.

In the meantime, the first girl took my order, soy latte and almond biscotti. As I was paying, the other girl came back and told the tall woman that they had some cheese pizzas ready, but the others won't be ready for another 20 minutes or so, they don't usually start serving lunch until about 11:30am. With the same insolence, she snipped, "I don't want a cheese pizza" and ordered an onion bagel with cream cheese to go and slammed her money down on the counter.

My family was one that went to church every Sunday and as a teenager I was a very religious person. I believed and I chose to go to a religious-affiliated university. Somewhere along the way I lost my faith in the church and it's leaders. As are all matters involving faith, it's a complicated tail.

While I no longer memorize Bible verses or sing my favorite hymns on Sunday, there are traces of my Christian upbringing that live on my heart and how I navigate my daily life. It may seem Pollyanna, but I happen to believe that if you carry yourself with an air of optimism and treat others with basic courtesy, you will be happier. I honestly don't understand the point of spreading negative energy to unsuspecting strangers.

Did ever a man try heroism, magnanimity, truth, sincerity and find that there was no advantage in them -- that it was a vain endeavor? -- Henry David Thoreau

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. -- Dalai Lama

Halloween 2011

2011-11-01T08:48:00.000-07:00

For someone who doesn't like Halloween very much (me), I think I managed to create a good time for the kids anyway.

I hope your trick-or-treat bag was filled with Kit Kats.

Morning Sundry

2011-10-25T21:21:00.000-07:00

This morning after dropping off the kids at school I returned home to find the following scattered in various places on the kitchen island:

1 copy of A Crooked Kind of Perfect by Linda Urban
1 copy of Diana: Her Life and Legacy by Anthony Holden
1 copy of Snook Alone by Marilyn Nelson
1 copy of Paper Airplanes: Models to Build and Fly by Emery J. Kelly
2 paper airplanes
6 ponytail elastics, assorted colors
1 sillyband, rainbow color in the shape of an apple
1 green plastic strawberry basket filled with tiny slips of paper, a small plastic skeleton, a one dollar bill, a five dollar bill and a spider ring
1 pair of mini soccer ball earrings
1 spelling test of 25 words with two wrong (substantial and frivolous)
Lots and lots of eraser dust

In the front hallway I found the following:

1 empty Gatorade bottle (lemon-lime flavor)
1 shin guard missing it's pair
2 pairs of flip flops
1 string cheese wrapper
3 ponytail elastics, black
2 pairs of socks, (1 yellow, 1 rainbow stripes)

In the girl's bathroom I found the following:

3 hairbrushes
1 lipgloss, Burt's Bee's, pale pink, top missing
2 drops of lavender scented lotion
1 pair of earrings, peace sign-shaped
1 lone earring, rubber duck shaped
1 pair of earrings, heart shaped, sparkly
1 necklace, initial "A"
4 ponytail elastics, assorted colors

In my son's bathroom I found the following:

Lots and lots of toothpaste smeared in the sink
8 dixie cups filled with water sitting on the closed toilet (???)

There are days when I return home to this and I am super annoyed. I harumph my way around the house returning things to their proper place. But today I felt all sentimental and tender about these objects. They are the odds and ends of girlhood and boyhood, the talismans of mothering. They are the good stuff.

For Anna

2011-09-10T21:46:00.000-07:00

I don't remember the words of her first comment on my blog, but I remember that it made me laugh. I clicked over to her blog and An Inch of Gray has been in my reader ever since. Pull up her blog and you will immediately get a sense of who she is -- pretty, classy, funny, warm, compassionate, creative with two adorable children.

Friday morning I opened my computer in the midst of making coffee, fixing breakfast and packing lunches. I just wanted to see what was on the hot lunch menu, but took a quick glance at my email. A message from a blog friend caught my eye. The title was, "our friend Anna's son."

I opened it and what I read made my heart fall into my stomach. Anna's son had died unexpectedly. Her smiling, sweet 12 year old son. It's just too awful to even think about. The pit in my stomach and heavy hearted feeling stayed with me the whole day. I had to fight tears when another mom at school simply asked me, "how are you?"

I must admit that it felt a little strange to be so heartbroken over the loss of a boy I never knew, to want so badly to make it not true for a mom I know only through my computer screen. I didn't even tell my husband about it. Not because he wouldn't understand, because he would. More because I knew he would tell me that there really is nothing I can do from all the way across the country. He would tell me to stop looking at her blog, stop trying to think of just the right words to type, stop asking yourself why her, why a 12 year old boy who just started 7th grade?

But I can't stop. Anna can't just look away from the terrible pain that has enveloped her family. She can't just shut the computer screen and continue to pack lunches. And even though I have never met her in person, I care about her and I am heartbroken for her.

Other have expressed this sentiment much more eloquently than I have here. This and this are beautiful and just, yes. Please pray for Anna and her family.

How do you know when to quit?

2011-09-08T11:09:00.000-07:00

The one benefit of being the child of a hoarder is that your mother will often bring over little gems like this one pictured at the left. Note my improper use of "your" not once, but twice! Ah!

I got my braces off two weeks before I started high school. In junior high I was the nerdy girl. I got one grade that wasn't an A during my three years at Central Middle School, I received a B in PE. I played the flute in the band, was a member of the 4-H club and I didn't own a pair of Keds. Back in 1985, those were all key traits of a geek. I wanted a fresh start in high school. I quit 4-H, put my flute in the closet and got myself a plaid mini-skirt and some Keds.

I begged my mom and my orthodontist to take my braces off. I never, ever wore my neck-gear or rubber bands and I didn't care if my teeth were straight. I just wanted to start 9th grade with white teeth, not silver. My mom finally relented. I'm sure she was angry and kept thinking of all the time and money we spent at the orthodontist. I never did put the braces back on and I don't regret it. My teeth are not perfect, but they are relatively straight. Besides perfection is overrated.

My mom was also not happy about my giving up the flute, but she relented because at least I was still taking piano lessons. Eventually though, I gave up the piano too, much to my mother's dismay. She was a single mom raising two teenage daughters and I know she must have sacrificed to buy that piano and pay for the lessons for me and my sister. Neither one of us stuck with it for more than three years.

I don't long to play the flute, but to this day I wish my mom had forced me to stick with the piano. I can still read music and play some simple songs, but I would love to be able to really play. I also wish she had not let me quit the private French lessons I actually really enjoyed. I don't even remember why I wanted to quit, probably so I could spend more time cruising the mall with my friends. In college I had the opportunity to study in France for one month. My mother did everything short of begging me to go. She knew I would love it, and what was one month? But I was terrified. I missed out because I was too scared to spend one little month in a foreign country by myself.

My nine year old daughters have been in all kinds of activities over the years. I've tried to expose them to a variety of things and I have never forced them to stick with any of them. They both were in ballet from the time they were three years old. Just last year, Macy started to complain when it was time to leave. When I picked them up from class, she was visibly upset but wouldn't tell me why. One day all the girls were let out of class except for my two. After a few minutes, the teacher opened the door, barely looked at me and shut it right behind them as they left. Macy started crying. The teacher was clearly annoyed and Macy said she had been upset that she wasn't picking up the dance quick enough and made both of them go over it a few more times after class. That was the end of the ballet. The look of relief on my daughter's face when I told her she didn't have to go back made me confident in my decision. Neither one of them ever really loved it, but it was still a little difficult for me to let it go, especially since I has just paid the non-refundable recital and costume fee (times two!).

My daughter Avery plays in a competitive club soccer league. When she first tried out, Macy wanted to try out too since lots of their friends were also playing. I didn't discourage her, but I had a feeling it wasn't going to be her thing. Macy is a very happy AYSO player, but toward the end of the season there is quite a bit of whining about going to practice. When I explained to her that practice for club soccer is two times a week and I would not (under any circumstances OMG!) listen to any protests about it, she decided on her own that she would stick with AYSO. Avery on the other hand, puts her shin guards and cleats on without any protest and will even skip birthday parties to play soccer.

Two years ago I signed up both Macy and Avery for a local girls chorus. They both enjoyed it and I loved the whole "girl power" philosophy of the program as well as the introduction to music theory it provided. It was apparent after a few concerts though that singing really wasn't Avery's passion. Macy would smile through her whole performance and I could hear her voice. Avery on the other hand, spent the entire concert with a look of boredom and sort of mouthed the words to the songs. She was just going through the motions. So when it was time to sign up again the next year, I only signed up Macy.

I was a little taken aback when Macy asked if she could quit chorus too. I brushed her off, but she kept asking. I knew she enjoyed it and she is a good singer. I know I am not raising the next Celine Dion, but Macy is a decent singer and she loves music. After I dug a little deeper with her I discovered that she was nervous about attending chorus without her sister. She likes the other girls in chorus, but none of them are her good buddies. Macy does not like to be alone and the thought of being "alone" at chorus made her visibly anxious. We talked through it and she stuck it out and did really well.

So here we are again one year later and girls chorus rehearsal has started up again. Again, Macy is asking to quit. She has been more persistent than last year and really wants to give it up. Again, she claims she doesn't like being there "by herself." She likes singing and performing, but the rehearsals make her nervous. I am very reluctant to allow her to give it up. She really is a good singer and I love watching her. I also happen to believe that forcing kids (and adults for that matter) into situations that make them uncomfortable causes them to learn and grow.

Unlike with ballet, where my gut told me it was time to quit, I am really not sure what to do on this one. I don't want to force her into something that causes her anxiety every single Tuesday. But I also don't want her to look back in a few years and wish she had stuck with it. Is it me and my baggage that wants her to stick with it?? I so wish my mom had packed my bag for me and forced to on to that airplane to France all those years ago. How do you know when it's time to take the braces off and they are ready to make these kinds of decisions for themselves.

No one ever said parenting was easy.

Off They Go

2011-08-30T11:10:00.001-07:00

I could not be more thrilled with the three amazing women who will be spending 8:30am-3pm with my kids this year.

Who wants to play Words With Friends with me now that I have all this free time?

Newsflash: I don't always have all the right answers

2011-08-25T11:30:00.000-07:00

Moments after I walked out to the pool and snapped these photos, Sejal starting slapping the water, tears starting to fall from her eyes.

What I didn't realize is that they were racing each other to the other end of the pool. Sejal lost.

"Why does she always beat me at EVERYTHING!"

I tried to comfort her with "she is good at some things and you are good at other things." I pointed out that she is a much better singer than Jayne. She wasn't hearing any of it.

"I WANT A REMATCH!"

Crap. Two rematches and two more wins by Jayne, Sejal was even more distraught. Simply listing off all the things that Jayne is "better" at and all the things that Sejal is "better" at just wasn't working. Not to mention the fact that it felt icky to be pointing all this out right in front of both of them. We try not to encourage comparisons and sibling competition.

The crying continued. There is no other way to say it. Jayne is a natural athlete. Nine times out of ten, she is going to best her twin sister at anything involving athletic ability. My sweet Jayne also has a fierce competitive streak and there is no way she is going to let her sister win to soften the blow. She will probably even talk about it at dinner and at breakfast the next day. Humility and humbleness are lessons I try to teach her every day.

I decided to just stop talking and let Sejal scream all her frustrations into my sympathetic ear. It turns out she really thought that she was a better swimmer than Jayne and she thought for sure it was the one athletic thing she could beat her at, making it sting just that much more.

As I listened to her I felt myself getting angry at her. Why couldn't I just listen, say I understand and let her vent. I told her she needs to find a way to get over it, go inside and have a good cry because I couldn't listen to it anymore.

I realized later that I really wasn't mad at her. I was mad at myself. I wanted so badly to be like all those moms on TV and in the movies that know just the right thing to say to life spirits and make it all better. I am her mom. I'm supposed to be able fix it.

For me, it's one of the hardest things about motherhood -- the not always having the right answer or the perfect pearl of wisdom. My logical brain knows it's impossible, but my heart wanted wanted to be able to take away her pain.

Two Weeks in August

2011-08-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

This was my view last week.

For the past seven summers we have taken a vacation with my sister and her family. The first two years we rented a house in Lake Tahoe. It was fine, it was fun, but it wasn't a vacation that we talked about the rest of the year.

Tahoe in the summer time is just not my thing. The water in the lake is freezing. It's near impossible to find a place to rent with a private boat dock. I don't really feel like I'm "away" in Tahoe. Too crowded. Too many strip malls. Tahoe is beautiful, and I realize it offers all kinds of activities geared toward all kinds of interests. Fancy restaurants and all, it felt like my same life, in a prettier location.

My brother-in-law suggested we try Bass Lake the next year. This year was our fifth year renting a house in the same little cove right on Bass Lake. My kids talk about how much they are looking forward to it all year long. We have endless stories and inside jokes that have come out of this trip. This year was no exception.

Even though the house we rented this year was a little dumpy. The couches sort of gave me the creeps. They all had a round grease (?) spot at the top. On one chair the spot had eaten right through the leather. There was the faint smell of cat litter throughout the whole place, but the smell was most pronounced right off the kitchen. Every light bulb seemed to be burnt out. There was carpet in the bathroom (who does that? in a lake house?).

But it didn't matter because we spent very little time in the cabin. To be able to tell my daughter to go jump in a lake, open the back door and...

Priceless.

The water in Bass Lake is perfect. Just cold enough to be refreshing in the 90 degree weather, but not so cold that you need a wet suit to water ski. There are no fancy restaurants, just a family run Mexican restaurant that serves amazing tacos, and combination bakery/pizza/ice cream shop, both within walking distance from our cabin.

It's an old-fashioned lake vacation, where moments like this are talked about all year long.

For our second week of vacation, my view has changed to this.

For the past three years we have spent the week after Bass Lake in the same rented house in St. Helena with my husbands parents. It's a fancy house, with a fancy pool and a fancy view. We force our kids to eat in fancy restaurants and visit fancy wineries. Yes, we are that couple who have the nerve to take their kids wine tasting (more on that later).

But mostly we spend our days doing this.

It's the kind of house where I can open the back door and tell the kids to get lost in the vineyards and they come back half and hour later with fresh picked wine grapes, blend them up with a little sugar and create their own "wine."

We've created for us the perfect same two weeks in August that we'll repeat for a very long time. One week in a dumpy little house on a gorgeous gem of a lake where my kids will eventually learn to water ski, where we can throw all five kids in one room to sleep, where the two youngest cousins can have a dance party on the dock and all of them can say that's where they caught their first fish, where we can spend a day showing our kids why Yosemite is such a magical place and each year we make it just a bit further to the top of Vernal Falls.

And one week in a house much fancier than our own where my husband can teach our kids about his love of wine and good food, they can ride their bikes through the vineyards, I can teach them how to execute the perfect cannonball into the pool and my son can eat an entire slice of the Campfire Pie he has been talking about since May.

It's my favorite two weeks of the year.

Seen At My 77 Year Old Mother's House

2011-08-06T20:48:00.000-07:00

She was valedictorian on her high school class and voted Most Likely To Succeed. She graduated Magna Cum Laude from the University of Minnesota.

She may not be able to remember when her favorite show is on or how to spell, but she does have a sense of humor and ability to laugh at herself. Posted with permission.

She's not the only one who can laugh at herself though. Look what else I found at her house today...

Me and my sister circa 1980. There are no words.

Minus One

2011-08-04T14:45:00.000-07:00

There is a girl on my daughter's soccer team who is one of seven children. I think she is number four or five. Her mom gets her to practice on time, her uniform is always clean for games and she always has cold water in her water bottle. I don't know how she does it. I watch her with a sense of awe. Probably the same way that mothers of one baby used to watch me with awe when I would chase my twin toddlers in every possible direction at the park. It wasn't unusual to me because it was all I knew.

People often ask me what it was like to have newborn twins. Well it was hard, really hard. But having one baby is hard too. I once tried only taking care of one a day, and trading off days. That didn't really work out so well as you can imagine. We all survived somehow. As they got a little older I realized that having twins actually works to my advantage. You know how sometimes it's easier to get things done when your child has a playdate over? That is sort of what it's like to have twins, they entertain each other.

All three of my children play pretty well together, 75% of the time. The other 25% of the time, is a post for another day.

This week one of my twin daughters has been at my sisters house going to a summer camp with her cousins. Which means that we have gone from three kids to two for the week. It's been a little strange. One the one hand, it's much easier to get two kids to agree on what is for lunch and supervising one less bath/shower/brush teeth/pajamas makes bedtime just a bit smoother.

But on the other hand, I feel like I'm missing a limb. It's sort of like the whole week has been lived in limbo until she gets back. I've never been away from any of my kids for this long.

My other daughter is at a soccer camp all week, so I've spent a lot of alone time with my son. Which has been great, he's a fairly easy kid. But after 10 light saber fights, several games of soccer on the xbox and buying about 800 ice cream cones from his shop in his room, I am ready for all three of my kids to be home at once. Mothers of only children, I don't know how you do it.

So low and behold, three kids is just the right number for me. An acceptable level of chaos without sending me to the funny farm, and enough kids so that there is always someone to play with. Or maybe it's just that no matter how many you end up, you settle in, adjust and can't imagine anything different.

My daughters pretty much hate me right now, and I can't say I blame them

2011-07-15T15:31:00.000-07:00

Back in May when we I took my kids to the dentist for their biannual check-up, we discussed the overcrowding situation in their tiny mouths. I had the same thing as a kid. By third grade I had only lost 4 teeth. My dentist pulled 6 of my baby teeth at once, then six months later, he pulled four of my permanent teeth. Two years later, I was in braces.

All three of my kids have the same issues. Small mouths, not enough room for grown up teeth. Our pediatric dentist said he'd like to take a look at their teeth in the summer and reassess. At least that is what I thought I heard, and so I made an appointment for July 15th. I told my girls this morning that after lunch they would have a quick appointment at the dentist and he would let us know if they would have to have any teeth pulled.

When we walked in, the receptionist asked what movie they'd like to watch. I asked if we would be here long enough to watch a movie. She said, "Oh yes." Uh oh.

They each ended up having one tooth pulled. No laughing gas, novocaine only. It was not pretty. Poor Sejal, who had to go second after watching her sister squirm and cry. The fear in her eyes just about killed me. In hindsight, ignorance was bliss. I think the anticipation would have driven us all crazy had we known what we were in for.

But we survived thanks to our ever-patient dentist and the promise of milkshakes.

Wordless Wednesday: BBQ Chicken

2011-07-13T09:23:00.000-07:00

Summer 2011: Weeks Two-Four

2011-07-10T10:30:00.000-07:00

We've been busy knocking items off our summer to-do list. We went to Yogurtouille, a few times. We made pizza on the BBQ. We went out to breakfast and ordered hot cocoa with extra whipped cream.

We set up our lemonade, chocolate chip cookie and brownie stand on one of the hottest days we've had so far.

We finished a puzzle.

My favorite day so far this summer was our trip out to the coast to go berry picking. The weather at the little farm was gorgeous. The strawberries were bright red and juicy. It was a little harder to find the ripe olallieberries, but we still came home with a three bucketfulls. They'll be perfect for homemade ice cream.

After putting our nearly ten pounds of berries in the cooler and stashing them in the car, we headed to the beach. Look how different the weather was just 1.5 miles west of the berry farm.

California weather is weird, but I love it. Despite the fog and my feelings about the beach, it was a very pleasant afternoon. So pleasant in fact, that I might even consider taking them to the beach again before the summer ends.

Pizza on the BBQ

2011-07-06T21:15:00.000-07:00

Not to be confused with BBQ pizza, which is really just wrong to me. I don't want BBQ sauce anywhere near my pizza. Sorry CPK. However, making actual pizza with tomato sauce and cheese on the BBQ, yes please.

We are big fans of homemade pizza. It's our Friday night tradition -- make your own pizza and family movie night. My husband is the pizza dough expert and even makes the sauce from scratch. However, for our pizza on the BBQ we used a flatbread recipe for the dough from Mario Batali's Italian Grill cookbook. The first time we had these flatbreads was at a party at the home of some good friends. I bought the cookbook the next day and we make the flatbreads and several other recipes from Italian Grill all the time (flatbread recipe below).

This was our first attempt at pizza on the BBQ and it was a big hit all around.

We usually have a bottle of white wine in the fridge that we use for cooking, but since we didn't have one already open and we did have a bottle of red wine on the counter, we used red instead of white wine in the dough. It actually gave it a really nice, tangy flavor and the kids loved the purple tint to the pizza dough.

I hope you'll give Norwindian Pizza on the BBQ a try this summer.

Sage Flatbreads

3 1/4 cups all purpose flour, plus extra for dusting

2 teaspoons instant or rapid-rise yeast

1 tablespoon salt

1 tablespoon sugar

2 1/2 tablespoons finely minced sage

1 cup warm water

1/4 cup dry white wine, at room temperature

2 tablespoons plus 1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil

In a large bowl, combine the flour, yeast, salt, sugar and sage and mix well. Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and add the warm water, wine and olive oil. Using a wooden spoon, stir the wet ingredients into the dry until the mixture is too stiff to stir, then mix with your hands in the bowl until the dough comes together and pulls away from the side of the bowl.

Lightly dust a work surface with flour and turn the dough out. Kneed gently, dusting the work surface lightly with more flour if needed, for 5 minutes, or until the dough is smooth, elastic, and only slightly sticky.

Oil a large clean bowl, add the dough and turn to coat with oil. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap or a kitchen towel, set in a warm part of the kitchen and let the dough rise until doubled in size, about 1 hour.

Gently punch down the dough, turn out onto a cutting board or work surface, and cut into 10 pieces (or 5 larger pieces for pizza dough). Roll each piece under your palm into a ball and place on a lightly oiled baking sheet. Cover loosely with oiled plastic wrap and let rise in a warm spot for 30 minutes (the dough will not double in size).

Preheat your grill. On a lightly floured surface use a rolling pin to roll each piece of dough into a round for pizza about the size of a dinner plate. Place them on the hottest part of the grill and cook on both sides.

Place each cooked pizza dough on a plate and have your diners put on the sauce, cheese and their own toppings of choice.

Place the pizzas back on the grill and close the grill. Check them every few minutes and pull them off when the cheese is just melted. The pizzas pair nicely with homemade lemonade garnished squished raspberries. Enjoy!

The Unlikely Chicken Farmer

2011-06-29T12:30:00.000-07:00

I'm not quite sure how this happened, but currently there are 4 six week old chickens in my backyard. Well, actually I know how it happened, but I'm still wondering if this zero carb diet I've been on has been messing with my brain.

My son loves these chickens. Pictured from left to right: Blinky, Peeeeeeeeep, Sparkleberry and Oreo.

Every year the kindergarten class hatches eggs at the end of the school year as part of their life cycle science unit. If there is not a family willing to take them home, they go back to the farm. In case you live under a rock, urban chickens are quite the trend right now. Way back in April, I casually mentioned to my husband that we should take the chickens home. He seemed to like the idea, so I mentioned it to Raj's teacher.

Temporary insanity perhaps? I do not have the best track record with pets, I still get the creeps when I think about those tadpoles. *shudder* But the real kicker? Birds are my absolute least favorite animal. I'm not much of an animal person in general, but birds... birds are just nasty, disturbing, the stuff of nightmares.

We have been happy with our current pet, Bun Bun Snow Sparkle. He's a very nice bunny. He lives in his plush cage in our backyard and is a pretty low maintenance member of our family. His cage is easy to clean, the kids are responsible for feeding him and he's soft and cuddly and cute.

Enter the chickens. I have to admit, they are pretty funny little things. The first few weeks, they looked like they belonged on my iPhone flinging themselves from sling shots in order to kill pigs and save their eggs.

Now they are less fluffy and quite a bit more stinky. I have to admit, they have kind of grown on me. They are not at all scared of people and they each seem to have their own little bird-brained personality. They follow me around the yard chirping their little chirps. They will even fall asleep in the kids laps if they sit still long enough.

My ever-so-handy husband spent the past two weekends building a chicken coop. Then it poured rain yesterday, and all the wood is now warped. Of course.

We won't know for a few more months who is a hen and who is a rooster. Roosters are not permitted in our little town, so time will tell which chicks we are allowed to keep. Everyone keeps telling us that the eggs the hens lay will taste so much better than store bought. I'll have to leave that for my family to decide, since I don't really even like eggs.

Why am I doing this again? Oh yeah.

Summer 2011: Week One

2011-06-17T19:49:00.000-07:00

We crossed two things off our summer to do list this week.

Go to the San Mateo County Fair - Check

Have a water balloon fight - Check (sorry, was having too much fun to go inside and get the camera)

To Do

2011-06-13T21:30:00.000-07:00

Today was the first official day of summer vacation. The end of the school year was crazy and busy and there are still loose ends to tie up. But the freedom from homework, the morning fire drill and the after school run around is a welcome reprieve. I feel lighter.

It could be because all three of my kids are in a super fun camp from 9am-3pm everyday. But I really think it's the no homework that has me whistling a happy tune.

This past school year was the busiest I've experienced so far. I said yes to every volunteer job I was asked to do and it was just too much. I spent the whole year just barely keeping my head above water. I shuffled my kids from place to place, powered through one assignment so we could start on the next, raced from t-ball field to soccer field in order not to miss anyone's big moment. I am looking forward to slowing down and reconnecting with my family.

When I came across this I decided we had to make one. So we sat down as a family and created a Summer To Do List. I'm pretty excited about rediscovering my inner fun mom and creating some summer memories.

Have a lemonade stand
Make homemade ice cream
Go to Gilroy Gardens
Have a picnic on the beach
Go berry picking
Camping with Dad
Go to the SF Aquarium and Rainforest Cafe
Go to a Giants game
Family hike
Vacation at Bass Lake and Napa
Read Little Women
Have a water balloon fight
Go out to breakfast
Visit the Oakland Zoo
Do a puzzle
Make pizza on the BBQ
Rent a waterslide and have friends over
Make a family mural
Go golfing (boys)
Get pedicures (girls)
Finish Summer Bridge books
Kids plan and cook dinner
Walk across the Golden Gate Bridge
Go to the yogurt shop
Build a tree house
Have an ice cream social
Go to the San Mateo County Fair
See Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer

What's on your to do list this summer?

And then this happened

2011-05-30T20:27:00.000-07:00

Today our little suburban town had a little Memorial Day Parade. My kids marched along with a group representing their elementary school. My husband and I dropped our kids off at the start of the parade route and then went to stake out a space toward the end of the route so I could easily collect them when the parade was over.

We set up our chairs on the sidewalk and a group of moms sat down on the curb in front of us. There were three of them and they all had kids about preschool age or younger. I eavesdropped as they discussed which preschool their little ones would be attending in the fall. One of them kept covering her daughter's ears because she was so afraid of her child's separation anxiety that they don't discuss preschool in front of her. They debated the play-based versus Montessori schools. I resisted the urge to interject and tell them that they should choose the preschool closest to their house because in the end it really doesn't matter all that much. One of them was pregnant and I watched as she got up from her curb seat countless times to chase down her extremely busy toddler.

My three kids walked by. We waved and cheered and took pictures. We went to meet them at the end of the parade where there was food and games and music.

The lines for food were long and there were two families with strollers in front of me. Another pregnant mom with a toddler who was clearly tired and hungry. As my family found a spot to sit and wait for food I eavesdropped again. The two moms discussed whether or not to just head home or stick it out and wait for food there. In the end one family stayed while the other decided it wasn't worth risking messing up their nap schedule and said their goodbyes.

We ate our tacos and drank our lemonade with some friends. My husband and I chatted with the other parents as our kids ran off to play games. They were in my line of sight the whole time and ran back occasionally to check in. Once they cashed in their tickets for prizes (which were books instead of candy! thank you carnival organizers, my kids and I were thrilled), we headed home full and happy.

On the way to our car we passed a couple carrying twins who looked about two years old. One of them was completely melting down. I watched as the mother struggled to hold her screaming, wiggly toddler and keep up with her husband and the other toddler. I looked at my husband and said, "I am so glad we are past that stage." He nodded in agreement.

I'm just going to say it, having two eight year olds and a six year old is easier for me than the baby, toddler, preschooler years. I didn't stress this morning about carrying snacks with me, what we would eat or how the event would work in with our nap schedule. I had uninterrupted conversations with my husband and other parents.

This stage has it's challenges for sure. But I'm finding day to day life just a little lighter on my shoulders lately.

We were all tired when we got home and we settled in the family room to look over the new books and relax. My son crawled onto my lap and watched as I surfed around the internet on my laptop. Eventually he said he was tired and laid his head on my shoulder. I didn't think he would really fall asleep, but he was out cold in less than thirty seconds.

I covered him with a blanket and closed my eyes too. And then it hit me. I was transported back just a few short years ago when he was a newborn and I could not get enough of holding him close. I would look forward to rocking him to sleep each night and would linger long past what was necessary in his room before setting him in his crib. Then my mind went back even further to when I would set in the big comfy, beige chair from IKEA with my infant twins asleep in my arms. They slept much longer in that chair with me than they did in their crib. I spent endless afternoon hours in that chair staring out my bedroom window.

I savored every minute of that afternoon nap.

Oprah and Me

2011-05-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

So perhaps you heard, today is Oprah's last show. The last time I watched her show with any regularity was when my now eight year old twins were babies and took a late afternoon nap. I'd sit on the couch with one baby in each arm and watch while they snoozed.

But it is the end of an era and love her or hate her, you have to give her some props for building an empire and being a media queen no?

In honor of her last show, you can read about how years ago I almost made it on The Oprah Show as a guest. Plus, the post has a picture of me with a perm in a hot pink Body Glove dress. Huzzah!!

Part 1 Here

Part 2 Here

Farewell Oprah! It's been real.

Something About Raj

2011-05-16T05:00:00.000-07:00

This is Anders.

photo by Blue Lily Photography

He likes sour gummies, his jeans lined with fleece, break dancing, Sean Kingston, soccer, lemon sorbet, Fetch With Ruff Ruffman, his blankie, race cars, Phineas and Ferb and his favorite color is green. He cried when Flight Time and Big Easy didn't win the Amazing Race. Do not ask him to eat "just one more bite of chicken" when he has decided he is done. Trust me, you will regret it. He has a wicked sense of humor. On April Fool's Day he rallied all the kindergartners to switch classrooms and line up at the wrong door. He was the only one that actually went through with it.

He is the smallest kid in his kindergarten class, girls included. People are often fooled by his small stature. They expect him to be timid, babyish. Those are two words I would never use to describe my son. He may be small, but he's mighty. Anders possesses a confidence that stops me in my tracks sometimes.

photo by Blue Lily Photography

I often wonder if my view of my kids is skewed because, well, I'm there mom and they are my babies. How can I possibly see them as anything but amazing when looking at them through the lens of unconditional, all encompassing mother love. But there is just something special about Anders. It's hard not be charmed by him.

Today Anders is six years old.

In three short months he will be in first grade. He'll get out of school at 2:45pm along with all the big kids. No longer will I pick him up and 1:15, come home and share a carton of lemon sorbet while we flip through cook books discussing what to make for dinner.

It's hard for me to get my mind around my youngest child turning six. It's so cliche... a mom lamenting her her baby growing up. But that doesn't lesson the sting. Six seems so big kid.

Happy Birthday Anders. I am going to squash you like crazy today (that's an inside joke). It really is too bad you didn't enjoy your birthday party.

photo by me

Family Dinner

2011-05-05T11:01:00.000-07:00

What's for dinner? Parents have been answering that question since time began right? Admittedly, I wake up in the morning sometimes thinking about what we will have for dinner. I sometimes plan my whole day around what we will have for dinner. I pester the kids with questions at breakfast about dinner. What do you want for dinner? What should we have on the side? Do you want baked potatoes? Green beans? Will you eat salad? What about grilled cheese? Do you want grilled cheese? How about tacos? Soft tacos or crunchy? Fajitas?

The rest of this post can be found here...

Shifts

2011-04-13T20:02:00.000-07:00

My kids were on Spring Break a couple of wees ago. As I mentioned before, we had no solid plans. I stressed about it for weeks beforehand. I bugged my husband about it practically daily. Then he finally told me he had to travel for work that week. Super.

But like most things that I obsess over, it all worked out fine. I took the kids on a mini road trip and briefly had them locked up at Alcatraz.

We read books, stayed up past our bedtime and watched movies. We had late, leisurely breakfasts. I must have done something really wonderful in the eyes of the Spring Break Gods because they played together. The played together a lot and without killing each other.

The night before they were due to go back to school, I was dreading it. I really enjoyed the break from packing lunches, rushing through breakfast, driving all over the San Francisco peninsula for soccer, Tae Kwon Do, t-ball, chorus, etc. I didn't have to search the house for someone's missing shin guard or make sure the white baseball pants were clean. There were no projects requiring two to three hours of my time, three trips to the craft store and a tri-fold poster board. I didn't burn dinner once because I was giving someone a practice spelling test at the same time.

Sometime over the past couple of years the dynamic of school vacations has shifted for me. Having them all home for a week no longer means I need to open a bottle of wine at 4pm (OK, 3pm, whatever).

It's the daily grind of breakfast, lunch, dinner, homework, eat a snack, change into your uniform, where's your water bottle, is your homework done, when is that due, will you be home for dinner, your favorite jeans are in the laundry, if I have to ask you to get your uniform on one more time (!!!), unloading the dishwasher in order to load it up again, read 20 minutes, flashcards 20 minutes, bath, brush teeth, get to bed before 8pm, lather, rinse, repeat. The managing of everyone and everyone's stuff is what drives me to drink.

Speaking of Spring Break...

I am hosting Easter brunch at my house. During a phone conversation with my sister we were discussing the logistics: what time should she bring her family over, what should we serve, what can we have mom bring that she won't screw up too badly (my 76 year old mother has somehow lost her ability to cook, but that is a post for another day), will my in-laws be coming, are we dressing up or can I wear jeans. None of these issues were as critical as the details of The Easter Egg Hunt logistics.

My yard is perfect for a spring egg hunt and watching the kids climb trees and sweep the lawn for eggs is my favorite part of Easter. When our kids were all toddlers, before I knew any better, I filled the eggs with candy. My carpets were covered in melted chocolate and I was finding errant jelly beans in the couch cushions until Labor Day. My sister offered to fill the eggs for the hunt the next year. The kids were thrilled with their mini, Hobbit sized crayons, 1,293,193 bunny rabbit stickers, parachute guys that break after one use and plastic flower rings that pinch the skin.

We've gone the mini-toy route for a couple of years now, with the idea that they get enough candy in their Easter baskets. But I recently cleaned out several drawers around my house and here's a few pictures of what I found.

OMFG, I am so over the little trinkets that have taken over my house. I have stepped on two of those little bat rings and if they come home from a birthday party with one more super bouncy ball I think I might scream. Please make it stop.

This year I have shifted from anti-candy filled eggs to yes! yes! load them up with sugar! Just please, please don't do not give them stickers, mini erasers, silly putty, bracelets or another f*#@ing super bouncy ball.

After doing a Google search for alternatives to candy in Easter eggs, my sister and I decided to fill the eggs with jelly beans and coins. Each child will also have a special egg with their name on it with a $5 bill.

Times, they are a changin'

Help me out Sunday blog readers

2011-04-10T07:28:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago we had some family photos taken by the amazing Blue Lily Photography. A couple of years ago they took some of my favorite pictures of my kids. I was so excited when I saw they were coming to the Bay Area again.

The day of our scheduled outdoor shoot was rainy. Rainy, misty, muddy and rainy. Did I mention the mud and rain? We were late. My husband was annoyed with my vague directions. My kids were in a wonky kind of mood. By the end of our session our feet and pants were soaked and cold. When we got back into the car and I looked at my hair in the mirror my first thought was, "oh well, maybe we will at least get some good shots of the kids."

I did not have high hopes for the results.

But then I saw the photos and I am loving them. Despite my unfortunate last minute outfit change into this blousy shirt that makes me look like I'm expecting my fourth child in a couple of months, I am nuts about this picture.

I strongly suggest you keep an eye on the Blue Lily blog and if they are ever anywhere near you, take advantage! You won't regret it, even if you change your outfit at the last minute so you don't clash with your husband's blue sweater. (Just be sure to make your husband change his sweater instead, but I'm not bitter or anything).

So here is my dilemma. Have you heard of One Kings Lane? Every time the UPS man knocks on our door my husband regrets the day he introduced me to One Kings Lane. I've got some really great stuff on that site, and I've also spent his hard earned money on things that are lovely, but we really don't need.

A few months ago I purchased a 20" x 24" photo on canvas from Chic Canvas via One Kings Lane for $65 (valued at $129). Then I took a million photos hoping for one that was worthy of blowing up and nothing really struck me. Then I forgot about it for a few weeks.

But when I saw these photos below from our Blue Lily shoot, they were exactly what I was looking for. Here is where you come in. I narrowed it down to four photos:

Option One

Option Two

Option Three

Option Four

I really love the black and white one, but I also really love the colors in all the others. I am going to hang it on this lonely blue wall in my family room.

I need your help internet. Which one do you think I should blow up on put on canvas? Leave me a comment and vote for your favorite. Don't be shy!

Disclaimer: Blue Lily Photography, One Kings Lane and Chic Canvas had nothing to do with this post other than being sites I adore.

Minivan Mom No Longer

2011-04-07T08:45:00.001-07:00

When you think minivan what do you think of? Soccer mom? Uncool? Frumpy? Goldfish cracker encrusted seats? No other car seems to evoke such strong emotions from people, parents and non-parents. I know so many moms who say they won’t be caught dead in a minivan, they “just can’t do it.” As if owning a minivan somehow takes away the last little bit of coolness you possess when you become a parent.

Come read about my journey from minivan mom to NOT minivan mom over here...

You're All Winners!

2011-04-05T22:53:00.001-07:00

So maybe my clues were too easy or you are all just too smart. We packed up my new GMC Yukon Hybrid and headed south to Monterey, CA. Once I finally got us all piled into the car, the drive was not bad at all. We drove along the coast and stopped in Capitola for lunch and ice cream.

We checked into our hotel and the kids immediately wanted to hit the pool. After we swam for a bit and showered, we headed to the lobby for the free snacks. The kids declared this modest hotel the best place they have ever stayed because the goldfish crackers and popcorn were unlimited and all they had to do was flash the bartender a smile and say please to get an extra cherry in their free Shirley Temple.

I did not ask for a cherry in my Merlot.

For dinner we decided to go to a place that my husband would never agree to if he were with us. My dear husband would not be caught dead in a tourist trap such as Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. But how could I deny my children more Shirley Temple's served in glasses with flashing lights?

They ate their shrimp and thanked me profusely for taking them to this amazing restaurant. Their father just read that and made a mental note to himself to school his children in what establishments are acceptable to snooty foodies such as himself.

Tomorrow we will hit the pool again if we wake up early enough. But the majority of our day will be spent at the Monterey Bay Aquarium. We've been here a couple of times before and it's always a fun time. We could spend hours watching the cute little sea otters.

I'll be cruising the gift shop and buying a little something for everyone who commented on my guessing game. Just click on the little Email Me button over there on the top right and send me your address. Thanks for playing along!

Road Trip: Can You Guess Our Destination?

2011-04-05T11:00:00.000-07:00

My kids are on Spring Break right now and low and behold I have found myself with no plans. Zero. Nada. Nothing. This is not the first time this has happened to me. So on a whim and a prayer, I'm taking my kids on an overnight adventure. By myself. I have a sweet new ride (more on that later) and we are leaving as soon as I hit publish.

So here's where you come in. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to guess where we are going. Here are you hints:

I live in or around San Mateo, Ca. Where we are going is close enough to drive there and back in one day, but I am choosing to spend the night in a hotel, because why not?
It will take us about two hours to get there. I am taking the scenic route, which will take us about 20 minutes longer.
Our destination is close to a major body of water.
Our destination is home to a major tourist attraction that is considered to be one of the most respected of it's kind.
I've mentioned this tourist attraction on my blog in the past.

So take a guess! The first three commenters to guess correctly will win a small trinket from our mini trip. You odds are pretty good since I usually get about 5-6 comment per post.

Assuming our hotel has wifi, I'll announce the answer tonight. Good luck.

Just in case you've ever wondered what an ancho chile looks like

2011-03-28T21:41:00.000-07:00

Blah, blah, blah. I never write on my blog anymore. Blah, blah, blah. Busy, busy, busy. Blah, blah, blah.

OK, moving on.

Last night my friend Jill asked on Twitter if anyone had a good tortilla soup recipe. I immediately started craving my sister's recipe. So I sent it to Jill, but then I remembered that dated almost exactly a year ago I have a draft blog post with this exact recipe. So I've dusted it off, polished it off, taken some fresh photos to go along with it and voila... here it is.

Last winter my sister's family and my crew rented a cabin in the snow together for a few days of skiing. We each planned a meal and I have to admit I was not too excited when my sister said she was bringing tortilla soup. It's not my favorite. The first night she suggested we have her soup for dinner I offered up my spaghetti and meatballs instead. The second night it was either Kari's tortilla soup or cereal.

I told my sister not to be offended if my son ~~and I~~ didn't eat it, he's not a big fan of tortilla soup either. Well man oh man was I wrong. This soup was different. Bold and complex and not at all watery. And let me tell you, my picky son was the last one to leave the dinner table as he asked me at least three times for more.

When I asked my sister to send me the recipe I was even more surprised to learn it was a Rachel Ray creation. Rachel has never really held my interest for very long and I am never tempted to make any of her recipes. But this one is a winner, with a few tweeks of my own. I don't make my own tortilla chips and my kids are not too keen on corn so I replace the corn with black beans. Also, instead of a red chile I put in a couple of canned chipotle peppers, it adds a nice, smokey flavor.

And I have to admit, the first time I made this I had no idea what an ancho chile was. I searched the produce section of my favorite specialty grocery store to no avail. I finally asked and learned that ancho chiles are dried poblano peppers. Aha! I love the flavor of poblanos.

So enough chit chat... here is my version. Go make it for dinner, you won't regret it.

Ancho Chicken Tortilla Soup

2 large ancho chiles

1 quart chicken stock

2 tablespoon vegetable oil

1 large red onion

1 jalapeno chile, seeded and chopped

2 chipotle peppers, chopped

2 garlic cloves, finely chopped

1 teaspoon ground cumin

1 1/2 teaspoon smoked, sweet paprika

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1 28 ounce can fire roasted crushed tomatoes

1 tablespoon honey

1 cup black beans, rinsed

1 rotisserie chicken, skinned and shredded

Salt and pepper to taste

1 to 2 cups water

2 limes

2 avocados, halved and diced

Sour cream, for garnish

Cilantro, for garnish

Crushed tortilla chips, for garnish

Shredded, sharp cheddar cheese, for garnish

De-seed and de-stem the ancho chiles, or if you like spicy, just remove the stem.

Place the chiles in the chicken stock in a pot and bring to a boil over medium heat. Reduce the heat to low and simmer until the chiles are tender, about 15 minutes. Remove from the heat and cool.

While the anchos cool, heat the vegetable oil in a large soup pot. Add the chopped onions, jalapeno, chipotle peppers and garlic and saute for about 3 minutes until the onions are soft. Add the cumin, smoked paprika and cinnamon and saute for another few minutes. Stir in the tomatoes.

Puree the anchos and stock in a blender and add to the soup pot. Stir in the honey, shredded chicken and black beans. Season with salt and pepper. Thin the soup with 1 or 2 cups of water and simmer over low heat to combine the flavors, about 20 minutes. Use your judgement on the amount of water. I add about one cup, but I like the soup more chile like and thick. If you want a more traditional tortilla soup, add more water.

Zest and juice 1 lime and add to the soup pot. Seed and dice the avocados and dress them with the juice of another lime. Serve the soup with crushed tortilla chips, sour cream, cheese and cilantro.

Around My House Today

2011-01-20T20:39:00.000-08:00

I found this on the counter when I came home from dropping the kids off at school.

While we're on the subject of Bendaroos, my daughter crafted this charming little fellow. It makes me smile.

My son has moved from level 9 to level 10 on Moshi Monsters. You would have thought he just scored a lifetime supply of bubble gum he was so excited.

And finally, we ended the day with a rousing game of indoor soccer.

The S*#%

2011-01-13T21:12:00.000-08:00

Way back in September during the first few weeks of school on a random Thursday, my phone rang. I immediately recognized the number for my children’s school and like every parent, went into panic mode. Who fell off a slide? Did my son forget his lunch? Does my daughter have another bloody nose that won’t stop? It was none of the above, it was much worse. I heard my daughter’s voice on the other end of the line. “Mom,” she said, “we had a fire drill today and I stepped in dog poop on the lawn. Can you bring me some new shoes?”

Come read what happens next and how I feel about dogs and elementary schools...

I guess I have to start calling my children garbage if I want them to succeed

2011-01-08T19:25:00.000-08:00

Another mom from my children's school posted a link to this article from the Wall Street Journal on Facebook today and it immediately caught my eye.

Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior

I have read it, and reread it several times and I've read a big chunk of the approximately 1,000+ comments. Clearly Ms. Chua's take on parenting struck a nerve with many. If you have the patience to sort through the noise in the comments, there are some really compelling arguments both in support of Ms. Chua's philosophy and others questioning her reasoning.

Here are a few comments I found interesting...

We live in an upper middle class neighborhood full of over-achievers and I would describe many parents at my children's school as similar to Ms. Chua, some of them Asian and some of them not. I often struggle with the pull of trying to push my kids to keep up with their peers while still letting them just enjoy being children and having playdates. You will never hear me berate my kids for bringing home an A- or skipping dinner to learn a piano piece. Yet, I often leave my daughter's classrooms in a panic after seeing how far ahead some of their classmates are in math or even with their handwriting.

I grew up in a typical American household, with a single mother. There were certainly rules and I knew the value of a good education. I took piano lessons, played the flute, played soccer, took cooking lessons and had an active social life. My mom was actively involved in my school. Once I got to high school I begged my mom to let me quit piano lessons (I had already given up the flute in junior high). Of course, my mom tried her best to persuade me to stick with it, but she eventually caved and I quit. To this day I wish she had forced me to stick with it.

My husband grew up in a household much more similar to the typical Chinese Mothers Ms. Chua refers to in her article. His mother spent hours working with him on math drills and handwriting practice. I am quite certain that I had a lot more freedom as a teenager than my husband did. He was valedictorian of his high school class. I was... well, not valedictorian. (Interesting side note: my mom was also valedictorian of her high school class).

My husband and I often struggle in our own home with our differing parenting styles. I think he is sometimes too strict and he thinks I am too soft. He gets easily frustrated if the girls are struggling with their math homework and will start writing out practice sheets with extra problems for them to work on when their done. Whereas I will sit with them, play cheerleader, try to boost their confidence and let them know I believe they can do it.

Ms Chua writes:

Chinese parents can order their kids to get straight As. Western parents can only ask their kids to try their best. Chinese parents can say, "You're lazy. All your classmates are getting ahead of you." By contrast, Western parents have to struggle with their own conflicted feelings about achievement, and try to persuade themselves that they're not disappointed about how their kids turned out.

Interesting. I've always thought that it's just not possible for every child to achieve straight As and success in life is not always based on your elementary school grades. My husband would argue that yes, all kids can achieve straight As (including ours!!) if you simply let them know that you will accept nothing less and with a lot of hard work, they can achieve it.

Like most of these things, I believe the answer lies somewhere in the middle.

It all boils down to your definition of success. If getting into Harvard and playing piano at Carnegie Hall is it for you, you certainly can't argue with Chinese mothering techniques. I would be interested to hear Ms. Chua's daughters chime in on the discussion and see what happens to them in the years ahead. What bugs me most about Ms. Chua's article is her smug tone and thought that hers is the only definition of what it means to raise successful children.

How do you encourage your children to succeed without making them feel like anything less than perfection means they are lazy? Do American mothers have something to learn from Chinese mothers? What do you think is the cost of this kind of parenting? Are American parents too easy on their children or are their expectations too low? I'm curious, what are your thoughts?

And so that was Christmas.

2011-01-03T09:50:00.001-08:00

December 24, 2010 --- January 2, 2011

Have you de-Christmased your house yet?

2010-12-30T08:18:00.000-08:00

I'm talking about it over here today...

Christmas Wishes

2010-12-25T10:06:00.000-08:00

I hope you feel like this today.

I hope you get the exact same amount of presents as your siblings.

I hope you woke up to this.

And I hope your living room looks like this.

Merry Christmas!

We're Skipping It Next Year

2010-12-20T21:00:00.000-08:00

Christmas traditions. I've really been trying to slow down this year and enjoy some lovely holiday moments with my kids. We've done crafts, they helped me write out my cards, we've baked, they practically decorated the tree themselves, and we've had endless cups of peppermint hot cocoa.

But there is one tradition I really could do without, and that is the trip to visit Santa. I never liked it when I was a kid either. I always felt awkward sitting on his lap, pretending he was the real Santa and telling him what I wanted for Christmas. Blech.

But then I became a mom and I dressed my little twin babies up in their fancy dresses and took them to the mall to get a picture with Santa. I only wish I could find that photo somewhere. As the kids got older they started to dread the visit to Santa as much as I did. This is one of my favorites.

Raj would not even turn around to look at the camera and the girls would only go near the guy if I was in between. After this there were a couple of years where Raj would not go within five feet of Jolly Old St. Nick.

Santa came to his preschool and this was the best I could get.

Last year he decided he wasn't scared anymore and he had several things he wanted to be sure to let Santa know he wanted to see under the tree on Christmas morning. And voila! A picture! With smiles even!

This year I really was not looking forward to it. My kids were sort of meh about the whole thing, but I decided on a whim to take them one day after school. And I find the result quite priceless.

Note my daughters fine fashion sense. Her idea of picking out an outfit in the morning consists of grabbing the most comfortable shirt and pants she can find in her closet. Two sets of different colored stripes? No problem! Comfort is key. And is it me or does Santa look a little bored? pissed off? annoyed? My other daughter refused to take off her jacket.

Did you notice my son's shirt?? Same as last year. Awesome. If I am going to repeat clothing year to year, I could at least do it with a little class no?

I'm the mom that makes you roll your eyes

2010-12-13T22:09:00.000-08:00

I am that mom. You know the one. The one everyone rolls their eyes at and says, "must she volunteer for everything." The mom who goes on every field trip, makes cookies for every party all while managing the PTA budget and scheduling the travel soccer team games. I'm the mom that you think is judging you for not signing up to be Room Mom five years in a row.

But you've got me all wrong.

Yes, you see my name on practically every committee sign up sheet. But never at the top, never as the chair, never as the Lead Room Mom. I have found my way of giving my time and energy to my kids school and activities in lots of little ways. Some of these things I do out of guilt. I see an empty slot on the Fitness Friday safety monitor sheet and I let it go for a couple of days. Then when no one signs up, I can't help myself, I have to fill in my name. It's only 30 minutes a week.

Other things I do because I truly love it. The elementary school library makes me happy. We have the most amazing school librarian and I enjoy chatting with her and getting book recommendations for my kids and myself. I love helping the kindergartners check out their books and asking them why they chose Swimmy for the third time in a row.

So while it may look like I am all over the place trying my best to make other mothers feel inferior, I promise you I'm not. I've just found my way of giving back that works for me. I know it borders on ridiculous, but I try to spend an equal amount of time in all three of my kids classrooms. This is no easy task, trust me.

I know that my way of fitting it all in would never work for other moms. I know that playing math games with third graders is about as appealing as an ice cold shower to some. Just like teaching an art lesson, doing playground duty or *shudder* lunch room duty makes me want to run screaming.

I take my volunteer roles seriously and I can respect someone that volunteers for nothing knowing it's just not their thing. I don't do it to win some sort of most involved mom award. I don't do it so everyone knows my name. I do it because I know that once they hit junior high neither my kids or the teachers will want me around. I do it because I like knowing what's going on at their school.

So believe me when I say that you don't need to roll your eyes at me. I am well aware that in a few years (months??) I will be the burned out mom who can't peel out of the school driveway fast enough only to return ten minutes after the dismissal bell.

And I'm Only On Day Four

2010-12-04T21:52:00.000-08:00

Things I've learned in the past four days:

Significantly cutting out carbs and sugar when they have made up the majority of my diet can make me really cranky the first few days.
Exercising after months of couch potato life feels really good right afterward, but not so great a few hours later.
Flipping through holiday cooking magazines should probably be avoided.
Those tiny little needles are really sharp, and there is a dial to control how deep they penetrate. Five is deep and one is not. I learned that the hard way.
Explaining blood sugar and what a carbohydrate is to kids can be complicated and might take several conversations.
I've gotten good at apologizing to my husband. (see #1)
There is no need to tell your children's teachers, their friends, soccer coaches, fellow moms at school or the mailman. My kids will take care of that for me.
People pay a lot of attention to what you are eating when they are aware you're diabetic. It's a lot of pressure, and also, very annoying.
I have a lot of supportive friends.
My daughter still loves me.

Being Forced To Take My Head Out Of The Sand

2010-12-01T20:00:00.000-08:00

This is me, December 1st, 2010.

I'll turn 40 years this coming January. I've never broken a bone and I have no allergies. I played soccer through high school, but stopped in college. I was obsessed with aerobics in college, but after graduation I took up running. I ran two marathons, it took me 4.5 hours, but I finished. Twice.

I've never smoked a cigarette, not once. I drink wine, but not to excess. I haven't drank hard alcohol since college. I eat a relatively healthy diet. Given the choice between a steak and a salad, I'll take the salad every time.

I've always had normal blood pressure. Even while pregnant with twins my blood pressure remained steady all the way to the end. My ob/gyn told me I should consider being a surrogate since my pregnancies were so easy breezy.

Right before I got married 10 years ago, I lost 40 pounds. Since having kids eight years ago I've gained it back, and then some. I haven't exercised regularly in a long time. Too long. I've avoided doctors for the past few years. I wasn't ready to hear the "you really should loose weight" talk.

Two weeks ago I couldn't avoid it though and I went to see a doctor about pain and stiffness I was having in my joints. It was so bad I could barely drive my car or make my kids lunches. My hands a feet were so swollen I couldn't wear my wedding rings and my shoes hurt. She asked all the usual questions, gave me a prescription and sent me on my way to have some blood tests with an appointment to return in two weeks.

I went back this morning expecting her to tell me that everything was fine. I probably had a virus that attacked my joints. She'd possibly tell me that my cholesterol was high and I should really loose some weight.

I wasn't expecting her to tell me that I have Type-2 Diabetes.

I spent the day in shock, but not really. My mom has Type-2 Diabetes and so does her sister, my sister had Gestational Diabetes and she tells me that apparently Norwegians have a very high rate of Diabetes. Who knew.

As I sat there and explained my eating habits to the doctor it hit me just how badly I've been treating my body. My breakfast consists of Indian black tea with a splash of milk. I have zero appetite in the morning. Then I get caught up in my day and only occasionally eat a decent lunch. By the time I pick the kids up from school, I'm starving. I grab something quick, and usually not super healthy, and a Diet Pepsi to get me through the afternoon shuffle of after school activities. Then dinner rolls around and I'm so hungry that I eat three times what I probably should at one sitting. I cook fresh, healthy food for my family -- I just eat a lot of it.

And I love carbs. And I love sugar.

All of this lead me to a diagnosis of Type-2 Diabetes. All of this has lead me to a box full of tiny needles to prick my finger every morning and regular appointments with a nutritionist and my doctor. (Luckily, I do not need medication yet. If I can make changes toward a healthier lifestyle, I may never need to take medications or insulin injections.)

I went back and forth in my head all day questioning if I had the guts to post all this here. You hear a lot about the Diabetes epidemic in America and the inactivity and unhealthy diets that contribute to the disease. Yes, I'm overweight, but now morbidly so. Yes, my eating habits are terrible, but I really don't eat much processed food and I actually like vegetables.

But it's time for me get my head out of the sand and do what I've known for a long time that I need to do -- take care of myself. My genetics are certainly a factor, but my denial about my eating habits is probably a bigger factor in getting me here. If I had started changing they way I eat and getting some exercise maybe I wouldn't be where I am today. Now I'm forced to give up the carbs and sugar filled snacks that I love so much. The chocolate cake or baguette I reach for when I'm stressed or upset is no longer an option.

So that face you see up there, is the face of a woman with Type-2 Diabetes. Learn from my mistakes. Take care of your body and your health.

I'd love any recommendations for Diabetic cookbooks or any good websites with meal plan ideas or recipes. There are a million Diabetes iPhone apps, which one should I download??

Brussels Sprouts Three Ways

2010-11-21T23:00:00.000-08:00

I'm just going to come right out and say it. I love brussels sprouts. And it's not just because they look so pretty in my favorite casserole dish.

I crave brussels sprouts. It seems as though at least two of my three kids share my passion for these little leafy green buds. I think my obsession with sprouts started when I saw this recipe here. I knew as soon as I read it I had to make it. I made it for Thanksgiving two years ago and it will definitely be on our table this year. I make a slightly modified version (below) since my husband is not a big fan of recipes with heavy cream (I know, he's strange).

Creamy Brussels Sprouts

1 medium onion, quartered and thinly sliced (I've also used diced onion)

3 garlic cloves, minced

2 tablespoons unsalted butter

2 pounds of brussels sprouts, trimmed and halved

1 teaspoon fresh thyme or 1/4 teaspoon dried thyme, crushed

1/2 cup reduced sodium chicken broth

1/2 cup heavy cream (or even a little less)

1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg (don't leave this out! it really adds something)

1/4 cup finely shredded Parmesan cheese or Pecorino Romano cheese

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly coat a 1.5 quart oval gratin baking dish with cooking spray. In a 12 inch skillet, cook the onion and garlic in butter over medium heat for 3 minutes or until softened. stir in the brussels sprouts and thyme. Cook for 4 minutes or until onions begin to brown. Add the broth and bring to a boil. Simmer, stirring occasionally for 3-4 minutes or until the broth is evaporated. Add the cream and nutmeg. Cook for 4 minutes or until the mixture begins to thicken. Transfer to the prepared baking dish. Sir in half the cheese, all of the salt and pepper. Sprinkle the top with the remaining cheese. Bake uncovered for 20-25 minutes. Makes 8-10 servings for normal people 3-4 servings for someone like me who could eat these alone for dinner with a baguette on the side.

Here's what they look like fresh out of my oven. Yum.

My second favorite way to make brussels sprouts is quite different, but no less yummy. I can't remember what magazine I found this recipe in, because it's so simple I've never had to refer back to the recipe. My kids like the creamy brussels sprouts, but they tend to ask for seconds of these shaved ones.

Shaved Brussels Sprouts

2 pounds brussels sprouts

6 ounces thin sliced pancetta

Olive oil

Salt and pepper to taste

Shave the sprouts with a mandolin, be careful not make them too thin, try for slightly thicker than 1/8 of an inch.

If you don't have a mandolin, you'll just have to go out get one because I can't imagine slicing all these with a knife. But maybe you have better knife skills than I do, and and extra hour or two. Again, see how pretty they look.

Heat up a splash of olive oil in a saute pan and add the pancetta. I usually slice it into small, thin strips, but this diced pancetta was in my fridge so I went with it this time.

Once the pancetta is nice and crispy, drain off most of the fat out of the pan. Add another small splash of olive oil and toss in the sprouts. Saute for about 5 minutes. Add salt and pepper to taste, you won't need much salt since the pancetta is already quite salty. Serve and enjoy!

My third favorite way to eat brussels sprouts is also delicious. I simply roast them following this recipe. I don't have any photos of this one, but trust me, they are pretty and of course, yummy. This is probably my husband's favorite way to eat sprouts.

Any other sprout cooking methods that I must try?? I am dying to give this one a try from the Bobby Flay/Pioneer Woman Thanksgiving Throwdown.

*This post is dedicated to my friend Jenn. I've had this in my drafts for a couple of weeks. She asked me for the creamy brussels sprouts recipe and voila, I was motivated.

Ten Reasons I Am Not Blogging Right Now

2010-11-02T21:50:00.000-07:00

Updated! I forgot the most important reason. See 1a below.

10. Soccer. Three kids on three different soccer teams, my husband coaches one team and we're team managers of another. All soccer, all the time.

9. My kitchen. My new kitchen has helped me discover my love of cooking. Some things I've made lately: Irish stew and homemade rosemary focaccia, brussels sprouts three ways, tortilla soup, homemade quiche, BLT pasta , Thai curry vegetables, skillet lasagna and lots and lots of stuff from here like this, this, this and these. So yes, I am enjoying my new kitchen. A lot.

8. School. All three of my children are in elementary school. Which is great, but this means that I thought I would have tons of time to volunteer and so I said yes to pretty much everyone who asked me to volunteer for something. It's all stuff I enjoy, but my gosh some of these moms can keep a meeting going on for a really long time. I also like to volunteer in my kid's classrooms. Three separate classrooms. I have these little chunks of time spread out across the week doing various things in the classroom. It really cuts into the flow of my day, but I like getting to know the other kids taking a small peek at what how my kids behave at school.

7. Laundry. I've talked before about my relationship with my laundry. When we remodeled our house, I decided to move my washing machine and dryer upstairs. It makes perfect sense. The clothes are upstairs, so no more hauling the laundry basket up and down the stairs. Brilliant.

Having the machines upstairs has had zero effect on my ability to actually get it all folded and put away. I spend most of my day downstairs while the laundry just piles up on the second level. I like to watch TV while I fold or do it while my kids are working on homework. The only TV in our house is on the first floor and my kids do their homework at the kitchen table. So guess what? Now I haul the laundry basket down the stairs to fold it in the family room, then haul it all back upstairs to put it away. Laundry: 5,942. Me: 0.

6. America's Next Top Model. I have never seen an episode of this show until recently. Have you seen this show? When I am at home by myself during the day I rarely turn the TV on. I'd much rather turn on some music or listen to NPR than have the TV on. Having the TV on makes me feel lazy and like I should be on on the couch eating bon bons.

But one day I decided I'd watch a cooking show while I folded some laundry (see number 7). My choices on the Food Network were Semi-Homemade (does anyone really watch her?? why does she have a show??) or 30-Minute Meals (eh, not my thing). So I switched over to Bravo and oh my stars there was a marathon of ANTM. I was completely sucked in. The next thing I knew I was two minutes late to pick up my kids.

This went on for a few days I'm ashamed to admit. I would tell myself just one episode while eating some cereal. And again, I'd end up late to pick up the kids. Then one day I sat down and instead of Tyra and the crew, it was Millionaire Matchmaker which did not hold my interest at all. Now I just avoid the TV all together during the day.

5. Words With Friends. No explanation necessary.

4. Jet Lag. Can I still claim jet lag even though I've been back from Europe for 2.5 months?

3. Stuff Management. Ballet, Tae Kwon Do, Girl's Chorus, Soccer (x3), Jazz Dance. These are all the after school activities my kids are involved with at the moment. It's all well and good, but it means I do a lot of running around between 3pm and 6pm. It also means I spend the last half hour before school pick up setting out the proper clothes/shoes/hair accessories, planning or packing snacks to eat on the go and making sure I have something for the child or children who will be sitting the car or waiting room while their sibling does plies, practices round kicks, hits a high note, shoots a goal or does their best jazz hands. It's a lot of stuff to manage.

2. Restoring Order. Each day after I drop the kids off at school, my kitchen looks a little something like this:

It takes a lot of effort to get it back to this:

No matter how many times my phone chimes that it's my turn on Words With Friends, I really can't get anything else done until order is restored and the floor is vacuumed.

Sometimes I don't really know why I bother though, because the island and the counters seem to collect crap about 10 minutes after the rest of family is home.

But for at least a few hours a day, all is right with my world.

1. Angry Birds. Halloween version, level 3-9.

1a. Laughter. Having conversations with bloggers over wine and good food is sometimes much more fun than having conversations online. I love these ladies.

Mosey Along, Issa, Liz, me, and the lovely Jill.

p.s. I'm Norwindian on WWF.

October is Over!

2010-11-01T11:39:00.000-07:00

We started out the month by trapping a raccoon in our backyard.

He was wreaking all kinds of havoc with our new lawn not to mention eating all the rabbit's food and spreading trash all over my driveway on trash day. It was pretty satisfying to catch the little rascal.

In the middle of the month we Boo'd some friends. The kids are quite stealth. We stake out the house, pull up the mini-van, place the bags, ring the bell and peel out of there just as the seat belts click and sliding door is just about shut. We only got caught once. Good times.

We made a trip to the pumpkin patch and decorated the front door.

Of course we ended the month with the school parade, pumpkin carving and some trick-or-treating with good friends. All three of my kids went as skeletons this year. Raj likes to have a little something to set himself apart and so the glasses were an essential part of his costume.

We set out earlier than usual this year which was fine by me. We got back to our friends house just in time to catch the end of the Giant's game and had plenty of time for the big candy trade.

Farewell October...

Hello November!

Right Now...

2010-10-11T13:58:00.000-07:00

My husband is in Chicago on business. (Don't even think about it bad people. I have a panic button.)

My son is on a playdate and they went miniature golfing. The other mom keeps sending me texts delaying pick up since they are having so much fun.

My twin daughters invented some game where one of them in Ramona and the other is Beezus. They have been happily playing together in the backyard for almost two hours. It makes me so happy I almost can't type this without fighting the tears.

I have three grocery bags from Whole Foods left to unpack sitting on my kitchen floor.

There are raccoon footprints all over my back porch and outdoor seat cushions. Some of our new sod is torn up the pest also attempted to get into the rabbit food I keep stored outside.

I have 121 unread emails in my inbox, three permission slips waiting to be signed and about five loads of laundry waiting to be folded.

I can't stop laughing about this.

My kitchen floor needs to be vacuumed for about the fifth time today.

I have Michael Jackson's Thriller stuck in my head from the mechanical mummy we bought this morning at the drug store.

I just finished reading over some of my archives and I am wondering why I was so much more comfortable with myself as a writer when I first started blogging. I wish I could recapture some inspiration and a little of the confidence I once had.

I'm on my third Diet Pepsi of the day.

This is what my kitchen table looks like.

If I Had a Dollar...

2010-10-06T12:58:00.000-07:00

... for every time the weatherman was dead wrong, well, I'd be driving a much fancier car than a six year old Honda Odyssey.

This was the forecast for today.

Notice the showers?? For Wednesday?? I was worried we would need our umbrellas for Walk to School Day. I took all the cushions off the outdoor furniture, covered the bunny cage with a tarp and stored the kids bikes in the garage.

Instead, this is what my back yard looks like right now. And trust me, there is not a cloud in the sky.

And then there was this just a couple of short weeks ago. Weatherman? You are on my list, and it's not the nice list.

It's Time

2010-10-05T14:16:00.000-07:00

Dear Husband,

I don't want you to freak out or anything, but I did something today that I know will get under your skin.

Are you sitting down?

I hung a dart board in our son's room.

Don't worry, the darts are magnetic. However, I didn't even measure to make sure I was placing the push pin in exactly the right spot between the window and the end of the wall. My trusty assistant just simply pointed to the spot where he wanted to throw darts and I obliged.

I am well aware that this will drive you bananas. You, my dear husband, who can tell me exactly who is responsible for every knick and scratch that turns up on our gorgeous new hardwood floors. You, who keeps the plastic covering on any new electronic gadget that comes into our house until I finally peel it off for you. Thank goodness I had the good sense to tell the furniture delivery guys to take the plastic covering off our sofa and take it with them.

Do you realize that we've been back in our freshly remodeled house for almost seven months now and this is the very first thing that has been hung on our lonely, empty and barren walls? It's time.

Remember when we were getting our old house ready to sell and the stager hung pictures on our walls and put furniture in all our empty rooms? And we talked about how great our house looked and why didn't we actually hang some pictures while we lived there?

I know every nail hole and fingerprint on our pristine walls pains you. I know. I know it's even more painful for you not to hang anything, anywhere without first measuring at least three times and then once again just because.

It's time though. It's time to actually start decorating this house. It started with the wall stickers I put in the girl's closet. Remember you actually said they looked nice once they were up?

It'll be OK, I promise. Get out your measuring tape and your hammer.

Love,

You Wife

p.s. I am all for hanging pictures, but I want you to know that I actually did not give my permission for this.

Or OMG this!!

Insert Title Here

2010-09-23T22:00:00.000-07:00

So you know when you've been away from your blog for so long that you fear you may not know how what to do with it anymore? Or you just don't know what to write about? But then you convince yourself to just get back on the horse even if you just write some random thought?

No?

Just me?

OK then.

************************************************

I thought that with all three of my kids in school I would have soooo much time to get things done that have been on my to do list for weeks, months, years even. I would work out every day and actually fold some laundry. Well yes, I have more time. And I like it. I really like it. But the getting things done part seems to be a struggle for me. It's like I'm frozen, stuck. I keep myself plenty busy, don't get me wrong. But I haven't accomplished nearly as much as I thought I would, like more writing for example.

************************************************

I think maybe I've taken the big ring fad a bit too far.

************************************************

I really, really want a new car. I am so over my minivan. I want a new car to go along with my new life of leisure. I really don't care what it is as long as it's not a minivan. It's been a good six year run, but I'm ready to move on. The problem is my husband. He is afraid to buy me a new car. You see, a few days after having the minivan I ran into a curb and popped a tire. It was so new, the dealer didn't even have replacement tires in stock yet. Then I scraped up against a purple concrete pole in a parking garage and the driver's side door handle still has a streak of purple paint. I have not been particularly kind the van and my husband is worried about what I might do to a new car.

I have assured him that I will be careful. I have seen a glimmer of hope that he may be ready to ditch the minivan. Then today he was standing in the driveway and I was turning the van around to take the girls to dance class. I do it at least a million times a day with no problem at all. But of course today, with my husband standing right there, I back into the basketball hoop.

Craptastic.

************************************************

When does this end?

This was after an after-school snack and one meal. It's been much, much worse, but my kids are eight, eight and five. When do they stop spilling half their meal onto the floor?

************************************************

Angry Birds is addicting. That's all I have to say about that.

I have the after school blues, or I want to start drinking at 3pm

2010-09-02T15:44:00.001-07:00

We are in week two of the school year here in my neck of the woods. My kids hold it together pretty well at school. But man oh man the after school meltdowns have been driving me insane.

I'm talking about it over here today. Can you relate?

10am

2010-08-30T11:56:00.000-07:00

I know. Two posts in a row, but I couldn't resist playing along with Nie Nie today at BlogHer. She wants to know what you are doing at 10am.

At 10am I was processing parent group dues and updating spreadsheets. Immensely exciting, I know. Now I'm off to fold some laundry. A day filled with simple routines, and I am simply happy.

Since my twins just turned eight, can I say I have sixteen years of parenting under my belt?

2010-08-30T10:23:00.000-07:00

My girls turned eight this past Friday. Eight seems so big and so small all at the same time. They are too old for a jumpy house backyard party and I didn't want to do a slumber party. So we rented a climbing wall and set it up in our driveway.

The climbing wall was perfect. The girls climbed for two hours straight without losing interest. I barely had time to squeeze in our river rock painting project and singing happy birthday. Jayne requested apple pie and Sejal made mousse au chocolat instead of getting a cake.

It was a fantastic party if I do say so myself. Even though I had to put the kibosh on one little girl teaching the others the lyrics to Kesha's Take It Off... not on my watch kid.

The next night we had a birthday dinner with family at Benihana. I'd say they were sufficiently celebrated.

Eight is a little strange for me. I feel like they are in between little girl and tween. They told me they are too old to play with My Little Ponies, yet they weren't too keen on boxing them up and donating them either. I get that. I remember being embarrassed that I still played with Barbies in the 4th grade, but didn't want to give them up quite yet.

They will still hold my hand and sit on my lap, yet there are things they decidedly want to do on their own. Like this weekend they each made a solar oven for school. It was the first time I didn't get involved in the project at all. They asked me for the supplies and did the rest on their own, a very welcome change. I like 3rd grade.

And conversations like this are another reminder of their growing sophistication:

Me: Jayne, did you close the screen door when you came in from the yard?

Jayne: Yes, I even locked it.

Me: Isn't your brother still outside?

Jayne: Yes.

Me: So you locked him out?

Jayne: That's one way of looking at it.

I'm OK with all this growing up and in between-ness. I am no where near ready for tweendom and all that brings with it. I can hold them in my lap one moment and let them fly free the next.

It seems as though there is one member of my family who is having a hard time with my Sejal and Jayne growing up. Here is what my mom got them for their birthday:

The stuffed lamb even had a rattle. sigh.

This One Is Mine

2010-08-25T22:00:00.000-07:00

Facebook, Twitter and blogs are full of back to school photos. I've always loved this time of year: brand new backpacks and lunchboxes, blank notebooks waiting to be filled with doodles or stories or math problems, new clothes and shoes, a new teacher and possibly new classmates. A chance to start fresh and the anticipation of learning new things. A new school year, a blank slate. I think my excitement is contagious.

Literally billions of children around the world are starting school. Millions of mothers across the country are sending kids off to kindergarten. So many little kids getting their first taste of "real" school. But this one...

This one is mine. My third and final baby on his first day of kindergarten.

I got choked up a little three years ago when I dropped my older two off at kindergarten. But when my little boy hung his backpack up, walked into the classroom and immediately wrote his name on the SmartBoard, I had to put my sunglasses back on to hide the tears.

He's been my side kick for the past five plus years. Only leaving my side for eight hours and fifteen minutes a week. He's tagged along to doctors appointments, hair appointments, meetings, lunch dates, errands and more errands, and volunteering at the school he now walks into comfortable enough to put his name on the board on the first day. "I'll have to bring my son along," has been my mantra.

Yes, this one is mine. Mine that I will miss terribly no matter how much I have been anticipating having some time to go to the gym and grocery shop by myself.

I am grateful for every poem I've read from his most favorite book sitting in our favorite chair, every matchbox car race where I came in 2nd place, every time I said yes to his favorite restaurant rather than my favorite salad bar. I'm grateful even for the trips to Target and Trader Joe's that took me three times as long as they should have.

Tomorrow I'll start in on the looooong list of projects I've been saving up for the past five years. Today I kind of miss my sidekick.

Fish Out of Water

2010-08-23T21:29:00.000-07:00

The highlight of our trip to Europe was definitely the wedding of my husband's cousin. If you've never been to an Indian wedding, you are missing out. The food, the colors, the music, the clothes... it's all so vibrant and full of celebration. We brought along an entire extra suitcase just for our outfits for all the different events with matching jewelry and shoes.

The wedding was three days worth of events. The mehndi night was Friday complete with a pinata for the kids and Dandiya sticks. All day Saturday was the wedding Vidhi. It was an entire day of ceremonies that I couldn't even begin to explain properly. Essentially it was the bride and groom have separate events with their families that prepare them for marriage. Sunday morning was the wedding ceremony and Sunday evening was the reception. When Indians get married, they are not messing around. It's a story best told through pictures.

Believe it or not this is only the third Indian wedding I have been to. The first was my own (ten years ago), the second was my husband's sisters (2 years ago). I never really know what to expect and my sister-in-law and mother-in-law have to help me get dressed. And despite the fish out of water feeling I had throughout, we had an great time. My husband's family is warm and fun and they embrace me and my kids with open arms. It was worth the 10 hour plane flight for sure.

More wedding pictures here.

Right Now

2010-08-22T22:15:00.000-07:00

I am watching a Dateline special on Hurricane Katrina and it is still riveting, 5 years later.

My husband is asleep on the couch.

My kids are asleep in their beds.

I can still smell the chicken curry my husband made for dinner.

There are more clothes in the spare room waiting to be folded than there are in my children's dressers and closets.

I can hear the dryer finishing up another load of laundry upstairs.

There are 27 unread emails in my inbox.

I should be in bed because I am still suffering from jet lag (and yes, I am still whining about it).

If I walk past the kitchen table I can smell the flowers that my daughter picked from the backyard and arranged in a vase.

I'm making mental notes about what I need to get at the grocery store tomorrow.

My neighbors dog is barking.

I keep staring at my calendar marveling at the number of meetings I have to attend this week at school.

My nose itches from a sunburn I acquired trying to enjoy the last few days of summer.

Just another suburban evening...

From Paris With Love

2010-08-11T13:37:00.000-07:00

This pretty much sums up how we all felt yesterday...

But today was much better. Here are the kids right outside our Parisienne home for the next four days...

We are loving it here. Truly.

Comments are closed. I don't have the ability to comment on your blogs right now, so you are not required to comment here.

So Far

2010-08-05T23:57:00.000-07:00

So in case you haven't guessed, we survived the plane flight just fine and we're having a great time in London so far. Here's what I've learned in the five days we've been here:

My kids will not sleep on airplanes. Ever. Even when drugged.
My kids are actually pretty good travelers.
Jet lag sucks. (read more about that one here)
When in London, skip the coffee and drink the tea. Trust me on this one.
It takes my five year old son about 36 hours to learn how to use the London Underground map and tell us which train line to take to get where we need to go.
There is a reason the British are not known for their fine cuisine.
If you order lemonade for your kids, they will get 7-Up.
I really wish they would have allowed cameras inside Buckingham Palace because I would have got a great shot of my son with his hand down his pants in the middle of the Grand Ballroom. Damn.

Here's a look at some of the fun so far...

1. Buckinghame Palace lawn (and my cleavage), 2. My fam at Buckingham Palace, 3. Kids in a British phone booth, 4. Buckingham Palace from the London Eye, 5. Big Ben!, 6. Big Ben (photo credit: Jayne), 7. London Eye, 8. Tower Bridge, 9. Tower of London

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Busy Signal

2010-08-01T22:19:00.000-07:00

I spent all day packing today. Packing and negotiating with Sejal who had about three times the amount of clothes picked out than would fit in her suitcase. I've been anticipating and freaking out about this trip for months. We are so ready.

Two eleven hour plane rides

Four days worth of Indian wedding events

Two rides on the chunnel

Four accommodation changes

Two bags per family member plus one large bag full of Indain-ware

Tower of London, Big Ben, London Eye, Eiffel Tower, Musee-Cluny, boat ride down the River Thames

Time with family we don't see nearly enough

Fish & Chips, chocolate croissants

Bring it.

I have no guest posts lined up, but you will all be busy at BlogHer and then spending days reading BlogHer recaps anyway. Be back in two weeks!

Holding hands in a taxi can change your life

2010-07-29T00:02:00.000-07:00

Fifteen years ago two young working kids fresh out of college held hands in the back of a taxi on the way home from the company holiday party.

Ten years ago today those two crazy kids held hands while exchanging wedding vows (twice!).

These days they mostly hold hands with these crazy kids.

But today they will kiss the three little people and leave them in the capable hands of their grandparents while they go hold hands in wine country for 24 hours... all by themselves.

Happy Anniversary Love! 10 years of crazy and I wouldn't change a thing.

What keeps me up at night

2010-07-27T12:22:00.001-07:00

There are two things that scare the living daylights out of me right now.

Number One: Taking my kids on an airline flight to Europe.

OK, I know there are literally thousands of parents that have done this and survived. But this fact is not comforting to me. We have not travelled much by air with our kids, well, because it scares the crap out of me. We have taken countless road trips, no problem. But an airplane? With three kids? NO THANKS!

In the car I have control. I can yell and pull over and bribe them with all kinds of things that they don't normally get at home like Doritos, 7-Up and unlimited candy. I suppose I could do all that on an airplane too (except for pull over) but what if none of those work? What if I am that mom on the 11 hour (OMG!) flight that can't get her kids to sit still?

Probably not the best strategy to have the second flight of their lives be 11 hours long to Europe, but too late to remedy that now. We leave in 6 days. I'll bring plenty of movies and activities. I thought about bringing clay or bendaroos since those things usually keep them occupied pretty well. But then I will have to carry around their little creations in my luggage until we get home, lest I endure a crying fit because I tossed a pizza made out of clay.

This is probably how it will go...

Jayne (age eight) will put her headphones on and play games or watch movies on her iTouch. She will occasionally ask for something to eat or say she's bored, but will generally do just fine. She has a tendency to get bloody noses, so this may be a problem, but I'll be prepared. Probability of Jayne finishing two weeks of Kumon homework on the plane and not embarrassing me at all: 95%.

Sejal (age eight) will be able to entertain herself for a little while with a new Babysitters Club book and an activity book, but then she will need me to interact with her. She will ask me for a snack approximately 929 times and need to get up to use the bathroom 492 times at least. I will play countless games of hangman or Uno with her. There will be a fair amount of whining, from both me and her. Probability of Sejal finishing two weeks worth of Kumon homework on the plane and not embarrassing me at all: 75%.

And then there is Raj. He is five now and should be able to travel pretty well. He has however, been a little difficult lately. He will maybe color for a few minutes. He will ask me for a snack about 5,294 times and then will not approve of any snack that is offered to him. The entire plane will be aware of the fact that his mother had the nerve to offer him apples, cheese or pretzels for a snack. He will watch a Curious George movie, maybe do some mazes in his activity book. He will need to use the bathroom about 383 times and everyone on the plane will know his name and the fact the he sometimes wants to kick me out of our family and get a new mom. Probability of Raj finishing two weeks worth of Junior Kumon homework on the plane and not embarrassing me at all: 15%.

I know we will survive and we might even have some fun on the airplane. But I am scared. Very, very scared.

Number Two: Shelves

I know right? Who is scared of shelves. Me, that's who. Open shelves are my decorating nightmare. I have no idea what to put on them to make them look pretty and no cluttery. As the daughter of a compulsive hoarder, excess clutter makes me twitchy. I have spent the past three years trying to get rid of most of our books so we wouldn't have to store them and move them around. Well now I need something to fill up the endless amount of open shelves that are all over my house.

My son's room has a whole wall of shelves and some on his built in desk.

There are some in my closet.

My desk in the kitchen

The family room.

And my husband's office, currently blocked by our treadmill, but they haunt me nonetheless.

Right now I am trying to think of something to put on the family room wall of shelves besides my daughter's bobble head softball trophies, fabric samples, a few books and some other random knick knacks. If you have any decent looking books you want to get rid of, please send them my way.

Should Be a Fun Week

2010-07-25T22:30:00.000-07:00

Note: click through and check out my new look. Tell me what you think.

Last week I had all three of my kids in camp from 9am-3pm. I had been looking forward to it for a while. Usually when I have the house to myself I go nuts with the cleaning and organizing and getting stuff done. I had a to do list a mile long. Here's just a sampling of what I was hoping to accomplish:

Organize the kids closets
Go to Costco (alone!!)
Organize my desk and files
Clean out the pantry
Fold laundry
Cook dinner every day
Exercise each morning
Buy something to wear for my anniversary dinner
Get supplies ready for our upcoming flight to London (activity books, download movies to iTouch, coloring supplies, clay, stickers etc.)
Redesign my blog
Get a much needed pedicure
Start packing
Pick up the dry cleaning
Organize the toy closet
Write
Answer long overdue emails
Send the long, embarrassingly overdue thank you cards from my son's 5th bday
Buy new, comfortable shoes for the kids and for myself for our trip
Buy matching jewelry for my outfits and my girls outfits for the Indian wedding we'll be attending in London
Figure out who will keep an eye on our house and feed the bunny while we're gone

The list was endless. Here's what I actually got done, prepare yourself for my awesomeness:

Folded some laundry
Got a pedicure
Wrote (a little)
Picked up the dry cleaning
Answered a few long overdue emails
Cooked dinner a few times
Re-designed my blog

Each day I would pick things from my list to get done and then I would just get stalled, frozen and end up doing a whole lot of nothing. I suppose I needed the down time. Of course now I feel like I wasted a whole week and now have to cram all of our trip prep into this week and all three of my kids will be home all day, all week. Awesome.

But hopefully you've noticed my blog got a face lift. Remodeling my house wasn't quite enough for me, I was feeling the need to redecorate around here as well. I sent out a tweet asking for designer recommendations and the lovely CityMama recommended the lovely Girlymama of Eliza Grace Design. I told Melissa I wanted something more subtle and pretty. I am so happy with the result. I even have a button! Hooray for me! Thank you Melissa!!

Six things I'll miss about BlogHer '10 and three things I won't

2010-07-19T19:56:00.000-07:00

All of the BlogHer chatter has really started to ramp up lately. It makes sense since the conference is only two weeks away and people are starting to get nervous, excited and wondering what to wear.

Sadly, I won't be there this year. I'll be wrapping myself in a sari, covering my arms in bangles and celebrating a wedding with my husband's family in London. I'll be taking my kids to the top of the Eiffel Tower and showing them what a real chocolate croissant tastes like. As excited as I am about our trip, I'm disappointed not to be going to New York. I had a great time last year.

Here is what I am sad to be missing out on:

The initial shock of seeing someone in person that you feel you already know so much about. It feels a little bit like a celebrity sighting, only most of the celebrities are just as excited to meet you.
The Community Keynote. This was by far my favorite part of the conference. Hearing writers read their posts outloud in a room full of bloggers is perfection. Last year I cheered on a dear friend and this year's line up looks just as fantastic.
Impromptu meals shared with new friends. These were some of my most favorite moments from last year. I grew closer to friends I already had and made new ones I cherish over meals where we escaped the conference hotel.
Running into Jessica in the elevator and having the courage to tell her how funny I think she is, which then turned into a 20 minute conversation in the lobby where I nearly peed my pants from laughing so hard. Or Marinka slipping her business card under random hotel doors, or my sister giving our room key to three different people on the first night, or telling Stacey how adorable she looks in her party dress. I'll miss these moments.
Impromptu girl talks late at night in a hotel room where secrets are shared and everyone is so tired, but just can't tear themselves away to go to bed.
The actual sessions about writing and blogging. I've been to some really great ones (and also some not so great) and learned a lot.

And just to make myself feel better, here are some things I am not so sad to be missing:

The Expo. Call me the anti-blogger, but I really hate the expo. I don't mind walking through it once just to see what is there, but last year I found it overwhelming and frankly, stifling. I do not like being pitched to and I really don't care much about free stuff. Detergent samples, lotion samples, a free loofa or a keychain flashlight with a logo is just useless stuff to me that I will have to throw away at some point. Unless you are giving me a free laptop, I don't want your sticker or trinket and I do not want 198,190 emails a day from companies that want free PR. Just not my thing.
The parties. OK, I know all the parties are a big deal, but they just annoyed me last year. Which parties to RSVP to?? What if you aren't on the list?? All the cool people go to this one, but they aren't letting anyone in! That one has a big line, but I've never heard of them before. Ugh. Something I did not miss spending any time worrying about. The smaller gatherings and meals grabbed on the fly with friends is where it's really at for me.
Aching feet because I chose fashion over comfort when packing shoes.

So if you are going... enjoy!! I'll see you there next year.

Textual Harassment

2010-07-16T01:00:00.000-07:00

I think my husband is going to sue me for textual harassment. I sent him 24 text messages in less than an hour. Based on that alone you may think he has a pretty good case, but let me present my defense.

It all started with this email exchange:

To: Jay

From: Kirsten

Subject: Dinner, 4:40pm

Thinking of taking the kids to Pasta Primavera for dinner, do you want to meet us?

-----------------------------------

To: Kirsten

From: Jay

Subject: Dinner, 4:42pm

Sure -- what time?

-----------------------------------

To: Jay

From: Kirsten

Subject: Dinner, 4:46pm

Will probably go pretty soon -- Raj is teetering on the edge of losing his s#*@ and now Sejal is crying because I told her to stop reading over my shoulder.

-----------------------------------

Pretty innocent so far. I knew I was taking a gamble bringing three tired and cranky kids to a restaurant, but the place is pretty family friendly and I did not feel like cooking. I also went into this knowing that my darling husband has a pretty hard time managing his time. I always add anywhere from a half an hour to an hour to whatever time he tells me he will be home.

My texts below are in red and Jay's are in blue.

5:10pm

We are on our way to the restaurant.

Leaving now

If he was leaving his office, it should take him about 30 minutes to get the restaurant. When we got there I looked over the menu and found what I thought he might want to order.

5:20pm

Do you want us to order you the salmon... artichoke hearts, capers, roma tomatoes, pasta with lemon?

5:31pm How far are you?

5:33pm How far are you?

5:35pm How far are you?

5:39pm You're coming to Pasta Primavera in Our Town right?? Not Pasta Pomodoro in Next Town Over.

5:41pm They are not bringing my food until you come.

5:42pm How far are you?

5:50pm Please answer?

During this time the waiter brought the kids food and they were just about done eating. They were already tired, so I knew I didn't have too much longer.

5:55pm Kids can't last too much longer, how far are you?

6:00pm I would like to eat soon?

6:01pm How far are you?

6:02pm Hello??

6:10pm Please tell me your ETA?

6:12pm Um, how far are you?

In normal time, about 50 minutes have passed from when we arrived at the restaurant. But remember, I was on three tired kids in a restaurant who have already eaten time. So it was actually two hours or so. They were starting to entertain themselves. This involved spoons, straws, ice cubes and tiny pieces of torn up paper napkin. I was on my second glass of wine.

6:14pm We are in Our Town at Primavera.

6:15pm Where are you?

6:16pm We are going to leave soon. Please tell me where you are.

6:17pm Not doing this again.

6:18pm Kids food is boxed and I have not eaten yet.

I ordered each kid a gelato. They had already had two popscicles before we even left the house and I made it pretty clear before we left that we would not be ordering dessert. My credibility is now shot.

6:19pm Where are you?

6:20pm If you don't answer me, we are leaving...

6:21pm Without your food.

He finally arrives and I was not surprised to see that he walked in with his phone next to his ear. Usually he stays in the car if he's on a phone call before he comes in the house or to meet us. But I imagine he had to weigh his option here... stay in the car and endure more text messages or come in and stop the madness. Guess what he picked.

6:22pm Get off the phone or I will take your picture!

I might countersue for loss of credibility. If he just would have answered me I probably wouldn't have been so crazy-stalker like.

So what's your verdict?

Why my suitcase is filled with saris and bangles instead of a bikini and a sun hat

2010-07-14T00:00:00.000-07:00

"We have to come back here for our five year anniversary" I said as we sat on the private deck of Beach Suite #9 while waiting for room service. My new husband ordered the divine poblano pepper soup for the third night in a row. Ten years later we still regret not asking for the recipe.

We sat in our private splash pool overlooking Zihuatanejo Bay and relived all the details of our wedding just days before. Every morning we sipped coffee from our deck and every afternoon we sat by the pool or on the beach and read books, took naps and swam. There were no blackberries, iPhones or laptops. I don't think either one of us even had a cell phone. Our parents sent us a message by faxing the front desk of the ho tel.

The only time we left the hotel was for an afternoon of sailing and once to walk the streets of the quaint little beach town. "We should buy more than three of these," I remarked about the pretty hand painted plates. "We'll be back," my husband said. "We can buy more next time."

One week on the Pacific Coast of Mexico and then we hopped a plane bound for the Yucatan peninsula. A private car met us at the airport and we drove forty five miles outside the town of Merida. In the middle of nowhere the driver made a left turn into what looked like an emerald green tunnel. It was a narrow road, just wide enough for one car, with lush green trees growing on either side. I chose the Hacienda for the second half of our honeymoon because it was on some list of the top ten most romantic resorts in the world.

The grounds of the Hacienda, an old sisal plantation, were enchanting. Our room was sparse, but elegantly decorated. Coffee and pastries magically appeared each morning outside our door. On the way back to our room from the luxurious restaurant we had to watch out not to step on the little frogs that jumped along the pathway.

We spent our days exploring the charming city of Merida. It's like a European city in the middle of Mexico; cobblestone streets, unique restaurants, gorgeous architecture. We hiked ancient Mayan pyramids in the rain and swam in underground caves. I swear that water was magical, I can still remember the way it felt on my skin.

"We have to come back here for our five year anniversary." we said over and over. Our five year anniversary came and went. I think we went out to dinner, but I can't be sure. We had three year old twins and a three month old baby. We were in survival mode. "Our ten year anniversary," we said. "We'll go for sure on our ten year anniversary."

In fifteen days we will celebrate ten years of marriage (July 29th to be exact) and I am not holding an airline ticket to Mexico. I have not been bathing suit shopping or asking my friends for beach book recommendations.

Instead of writing out instructions for my in-laws about how to manage my kids daily schedules, I filled out three passport applications. Instead of asking for beach reads, I'm asking my friends for ideas to keep three kids busy for eleven hours on an airplane. We are holding five tickets from San Francisco to London and I have an entire suitcase full of Indian clothes for four days worth of wedding events.

My husband's cousin is getting married in London and we're taking the family on a European vacation. One week in London and a few days in Paris. We have not done much traveling with our kids. The girls have taken two airplane trips and my son, only one. They are beyond excited.

It's going to be amazing. To watch my kids experience Europe for the first time... I can't wait. My husband's family in London is delightful and I know they will surround my children with love and laughter. I'm nervous, terrified of the flight, even more terrified of the time change. Mostly I'm excited.

And yet I can't help but be a little disappointed about not being able to relive our honeymoon. There is no law that says you have to have an over the top celebration for your ten year anniversary. There's always next year. Next year I'll be buying sundresses and arranging childcare.

Note: because we got married in the stone ages, we do not have any digital pictures from our honeymoon. I think we owned a digital camera, but it was so big and bulky and the picture quality was not good at all. We left it in the hotel safe for most of our trip. I dug out the box labeled "wedding keepsakes" from the garage and took photos of our pictures. We do have a scanner, but it is soooooo slow.

Open House Part 4

2010-06-30T23:22:00.000-07:00

So clearly I need to stop ending these posts with, "tomorrow I will show you..." because I think it's pretty evident that "tomorrow" means in a few days or more likely "next week or so." Let's just pretend that today is Monday OK?

As promised... today I'll show you my dining room. Here it is before the remodel:

We loved that brick red color and it looked perfect in our dining room in the house we owned before this one. But it never quite worked here. The room was pretty, but it felt like a cavernous. The absence of a chandelier made it even worse.

Here it is today:

Try to ignore the fact that we don't have any fancy dining room chairs yet. It's one of those things that keeps falling to the bottom of the list.

We raised the chair rail, added more moldings and, duh... put in a chandelier. The wall paper is an orange-y and gold very thin stripe. It's so much better than the brick red paint and lightens up the whole room. And I love the quirky sconces.

The french doors used to be sealed shut. We replaced them, added new hardware and now they open up to our backyard.

Many, many meals will be eaten here with family and friends. For now they will be eaten on a mismatched, old banged up chairs from Ikea. One thing a time people.

"Tomorrow" I might show you my kids rooms.

Open House Part 3

2010-06-27T21:48:00.000-07:00

We've been back in our house for three-ish months now and still the little projects go on and on. We have several rooms with no furniture and three out of five bathrooms with no faucets. But hey, I just realized I do have five working toilets so each member of my family can use a toilet at the same time if the need ever arises so boo-yah for me.

Every time I think about updating my blog with photos, I decide I'll just wait until the sink goes in or the curtains go up... and then it just drags on and on. So I'll carry on with my Open House posts and you'll just have to use your imagination for things like art work on the walls and faucets.

Today I welcome you into my entryway. Here's what it looked like before the remodel:

Note the lovely asbestos floor circa 1950. And here it is post removal of the asbestos floor:

And today when you enter my home, this is what you see:

Asbestos floor has been replaced with travertine, new doors and hardware and the closet moved from the left to the right to make space for the new powder room.

If you look closely, you can see the leaves that were stenciled on the walls with a very subtle, shiny paint.

They were made to mirror the wallpaper in one of my favorite rooms in the house, the powder room.

I don't have any pictures of our powder room before, but just picture royal blue tiles on the floor and green walls with a toilet that was at least 30 years old. I wanted the powder room to be "not boring" and I think we achieved it.

I love the orange ceiling and that is one of my most favorite light fixtures in the whole house.

Picture a bowl sink here and also, a faucet.

I love the shadows the light fixture make on the walls.

Tomorrow I'll show you my dining room. Prepare for more wall paper. Woo hoo!

Speak Softly

2010-06-17T10:10:00.000-07:00

And chase your sisters away with your big stick.

Laugh Now, Thank Me Later

2010-06-13T23:31:00.000-07:00

I spent my weekend complaining to my husband about how I desperately need a break from managing our household. I took every opportunity to point out to him everything I do around here.

"I wish I could sit down and watch the World Cup, but someone has to clean up breakfast."

"I'd love to hang out in the backyard and play on the Slip 'N Slide, but I need to take Jayne to rehearsal for her recital. Of course I volunteered to help out, so I'll be running around the auditorium for three hours chasing mini ballerinas."

"Don't worry... I didn't want take a nap on the couch. I'd much rather fold 192,384 loads of laundry."

And on and on and on. No wonder he caught a cab to the airport for a business trip the moment Jayne left the stage after her brilliant ballet performance.

So yeah. I need a day, or two, or five hundred to myself to regain some sanity. But that won't be happening anytime soon. Because tomorrow is our first official day of summer. Hooray! All three kids home all day!!! All three kids home all day with no plans!!

One thing that keeps me going is trying to maintain a sense of humor. Other things that keep me going are whining and complaining on my blog and bitching to my husband, but let's talk about the humor for a moment.

Did you know I was featured on Five Star Friday? No? Well yes I was, and it made my day. So thank you to whoever submitted my little blog.

Friday evening I was reading over the other posts featured and came across one of the funniest posts I've ever read. I read it minutes after I had an argument with my darling husband about some comment he made regarding Raj's birthday presents still sitting behind the couch nearly a month after his birthday party and "shouldn't someone (read ME) put them away?". I was still giving him the silent treatment and trying to maintain my angry face. It took every ounce of energy I had not to burst out laughing while reading Anniversary Weekend by Finslippy. Considered yourself warned though: do not read it unless you are in a place where laughing hysterically is acceptable.

Thank God the kids were in bed and my husband was on an airplane when I read Marinka's latest post. I won't tell you too much about it because I don't want to ruin the ending. Just trust me... it's funny beyond funny. You simply must read it.

So what keeps you going when your tired and burned out, but there is no end to the madness in sight??

Just Like That

2010-06-11T21:39:00.000-07:00

August 25, 2009

June 11, 2010

A preschool graduate ready for kindergarten, and two official third graders ready for summer. We've got lots of plans; a little summer school, art camp, soccer camp, cooking camp, swim lessons, some weekend getaways and the grande finale of our summer... a trip to London for a family wedding in August. We are rookies when it comes to international travel with our children. Raj has only been on an airplane once in all of his five years. I'm looking to you for some travel tips.

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Oh my gosh thank you so much for all your comments, support, empathy on my previous post. You have no idea how much it helps to know I'm not alone. But then again, maybe you do know. Thank you.

The Weight of It All

2010-06-07T21:41:00.000-07:00

This was not the post I intended to write today. I have tons of pictures and planned on continuing my Open House series. And yet, I just can't. I have to write this instead. The truth is I've been writing this post in my head for the past few days, weeks, months even. Somehow writing it in my head gets me through some hard moments. But it's time to actually get it out of my head, stop hiding and write it.

I've just finished reading Love Walked In by Marisa De Los Santos. It's not the best book I've ever read, but the writing was lovely and I certainly enjoyed it. I went back and read this particular passage several times. It's describes the thoughts of a step-mother type figure comforting a child who's mother has gone a little nuts and is missing.

I sat up and rubbed her back with the circular motion I've always found soothing. After a while, she put her head in my lap and said, "I want my mommy."

I thought about those words, how they contained so much more than they seemed to contain, more than any four words could hold. They meant what they meant and were also a universal cry, maybe the universal cry for comfort. Soldiers in the heat of battle; death-row prisoners; explorers stranded in deserts, jungles, on montaintops; anyone sick or lost or just tired and bewildered: we all wanted our mothers. I thought about my own mother -- straight-backed, eternally smiling, never without tissues, Band-Aids, lipstick, aspirin, optimism, and reassurance. Mothers -- why didn't they all collapse under such weight? I shivered.

It speaks to me, that passage. That is how I have felt these past few days (weeks? months?). I want to collapse under the weight of motherhood. I'm overwhelmed. There are moments when it's just too much to take on three other people's problems and needs.

I have been in the trenches of mothering for almost eight years now. Eight years of meeting the daily, hourly, by the minute needs of three little people. My kids who I love and adore and cherish, sometimes make me want to collapse under the weight of their needs. And then I want to collapse under the weight of the guilt that comes along with wishing they would just go away for a day and give me a little peace and quiet.

For nearly eight years I have been alone with them from the moment they wake up until bedtime. My husband leaves for work at 6am and when he is not traveling, sometimes makes it home in time for dinner and sometimes in time to tuck them into bed. Everything that falls between waking up and tucking back into bed is all me. I realize I am far from the only woman out there who is walking this road. But that does not make my exhaustion any less valid.

This morning I did nothing but snap at them. Get dressed. Get your books. Why are you not brushing your teeth? Why doesn't anyone ever listen to me? I don't care if you don't want hot lunch, I don't feel like packing a lunch this morning. I needed them to be out of the house. I needed some quiet. I just want to get dressed without 338,393 interruptions!! Is that too much to ask?!?!

As I opened the door of the car and they piled out and off to school I immediately felt like crap. Why couldn't I just suck it up and make the morning pleasant? I've had more moments like this lately than I care to admit.

Now I am staring down the barrel of summer. While summer brings lots of happy things like fewer commitments, some family trips, swimming, backyard bbq's, homemade ice cream and a more leisurely pace; it also makes the alone time I so crave even more scarce. And that kind of scares me.

In the fall my son will start kindergarten and with all three kids in school I will finally have longer chunks of time to devote to more selfish pursuits like exercise and grocery shopping with no children in tow. I would by lying if I said I am not looking forward to it. I am ready.

But I am also no dummy. I know these days are fleeting. Already I miss the days of strollers and toddlers and sandboxes. I know I should soak up every moment of being a mom to a five year old and two almost eight year olds. It will be over in a flash and the grocery store aisles will fell lonely without someone asking me every five seconds if we can buy Frosted Flakes.

So I try to remind myself of this when my patience is wearing thin and I start to snap. Not always an easy thing for me to do. I'll do my best to make this a summer we will all remember with fondness as the best of times. I know my time will come.

Open House Part 2

2010-06-01T22:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I showed you my master bathroom/bedroom and today I'll continue my home tour with my kid's bathrooms. I am so happy with how they turned out. I feel like they are unique and of so perfect for us. We purposely bought a fixer upper so we could make it our own and this is why.

This was my daughter's bathroom before the remodel:

And here is how it looks today:

It's pink and pearly and feminine. Of course between the time we picked out all the tiles and when we moved back in Sejal and Jayne decided they no longer liked pink. But it's not a obnoxious pink and they love the shower curtain I picked up at Target to brighten things up a bit.

Our amazing cabinet maker built this vanity based that the interior designer who helped me designed. It is one of my favorite things in the whole house.

At some point we will get them a faucet so they can smear their toothpaste all over the new counter. But until then, they are forced to brush their teeth in their brother's bathroom, which looked like this before the remodel:

We added a shower and now it looks like this:

You can't tell from this photo, but the walls are a nice shade of grey-ish blue that looks great with the grey veined tiles. I love that it's a bathroom that is masculine and will be great for a teenage boy someday (in the very distant future thankyouverymuch). I love the tiles on the floor.

And here's a close up of the little accent shower tiles:

I was going to post some pictures of our powder room, but I can't stay up any longer waiting for blogger to upload my photos. I'll save those for another time. Tomorrow I will try to pick up around the house a bit so I can take pictures of something other than bathrooms.

Open House Part 1

2010-05-31T22:36:00.000-07:00

Every day I think to myself that I really should update my blog with some house pictures. But that would mean I would need to clean up a bit to take some decent pictures. Then I look around and think maybe I will wait until all the drawer pulls are here. Or I really should wait until new rug comes for the family room or we finally get around to ordering a faucet for the girl's bathroom.

There really isn't any room in our house that is completely finished. Some rooms are well on their way to being done and some are, well, not very close to being done at all. If I wait for everything to be done before posting some pictures, it may coincide with pictures of my kids graduating from high school.

So I will try to spend this week posting some pictures of the transformation. I might even clean up some of the clutter.

First up... the master bedroom, bathroom and closet.

Here is what my master bathroom looked like a year ago:

And here is how it looks today:

We turned this wall:

Into this:

And this was my shower/bathtub before:

We are still waiting for the tub filler, but here it is today:

Having shaved my legs in a shower that I could barely turn around in for two plus years, I am really enjoying that shower. But my favorite two things in the bathroom are the floor and the vanity we had made. Happiness.

Our master bedroom is not a large room, but it's adjoined by a small dressing room. Before the remodel the dressing room was just a small, empty room with two small closets. The same cabinet maker that did our master bathroom vanity filled the room with custom built ins.

We didn't change much in our bedroom besides new paint and light fixtures and rearranged the furniture a bit.

There you have it! To be continued...

The F*#%(#% Laundry

2010-05-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

Let me introduce you to my nemesis.

The fricking fracking laundry. I can not stay on top of the fricking fracking laundry. It's the Dr. Doofenshmirtz to my Perry the Platypus. This is clean laundry waiting to be folded and put away. And there is a load in the dryer AND the washer right now.

To make matters worse, there is another hamper full of clothes ready for a whirl in the washing machine.

I think there are more clothes waiting to be folded or in the machine than there are in our closets and dressers. I have no problem getting it into the washing machine and dried. But I have a colossal problem getting it folded and put away.

I've got all kinds of excuses.

The washing machine and dryer are on the second floor. Makes sense right? That is where all our clothes are located. Duh. But I like to watch TV while I fold laundry and right now the only working TV in our house is downstairs. I would have to haul all those clothes all the way downstairs, fold them, and then haul them all the way upstairs. I know. There is just no way.

Today I vowed to get it done. But Raj didn't have school today and after a rousing game of dinosaur soccer he challenged me to a game of indoor bowling. How could I say no? I finally went upstairs to fold, but Raj was not interested in playing upstairs and after 234,392,293 interruptions for snacks, requests to find Curious George on PBSkids.org, tape, the three hole puncher, string batteries, etc. I gave up.

I have very little time alone in my house without children running around. Raj is only in preschool for eight hours and fifteen minutes a week. I prefer to spend that precious time doing things like showering without interruption, grocery shopping without children tagging along, answering emails or sitting on the couch reading blogs. Folding laundry is not at the top of the list.

I just can't seem to find a system that works and so it sits. Thus it takes me forever to find something to wear and for-freaking-ever to find matching socks for the kids.

When do you do you fold your laundry? Am I just being lazy? Please come over and fold my laundry. I will pay top dollar.

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In other news, I'm doling out advice to Kelcey from The Mama Bird Diaries over at The Mouthy Housewives today. Go check it out. And my most heartfelt congratulations to Kelcey and her family on the arrival of her double bundles of joy. Let the fun begin!

Project 3-6-Fail

2010-05-24T21:11:00.000-07:00

Remember back at the beginning of the year when I started Project 356? A photo a day for 365 days??

Yeah, I barely remember it either. I made it 59 days.

At least that's better than when I tried it in 2008. I only made it 35 days during that attempt.

I need to just accept the fact that I probably won't make it happen in 2011 either. Remind me of that when I decide to give it one more shot. One day went by without a photo. And then it turned into two days. And then three, four, five and I wasn't sure what to do so I gave it up. It's harder than you think it is, this photo a day thing.

It's almost as pathetic as my lack of blogging since New Year's.

I haven't completely put my camera away though. Here's a little bit of what may have made it into my failed project 365.

My girls gave softball a whirl and love it.

My kids opened a restaurant

Presentations were given at school
We ate chocolate rabbits
We spent some time with cousins
Aaaaaaand, my tiny baby boy turned five.

If he had any idea that I just called him tiny and the dreaded baby he would flip. If you want to really hit him where it hurts, call him a baby. The boy is five now and proud of it.

My Heart in a Tutu

2010-05-05T21:38:00.000-07:00

My husband likes to make jokes about me favoring Sejal over Jayne. I love all three of my kids equally, but I love all three of them differently. The squeaky wheel gets the grease right? And Sejal and Raj are simply squeakier than Jayne. She is a rule follower, a relatively easy child to parent. If I ask her to make her bed, she does it. She runs off to soccer practice, ballet rehearsal or chorus with a little wave and barely looks back.

"You don't need to get out of the car mom. See you later."

With Sejal, I walk her in to wherever she's going, stay for a few minutes and leave after several reassurances that I'll be right outside the door when class lets out. I plant myself on the bench during Raj's soccer practice rather than run a quick errand because if he can't see me, he won't go back the next week.

If we go on a long car ride, Jayne puts her headphones in her Leapster or her iTouch and barely makes a peep. No wiggling, no "I'm bored," no "change the music, I hate this song." When her brother pitches a fit because his sisters got a birthday treat at school and he didn't, Jayne gives him hers. She wears whatever I pick out for her in the morning. She drinks her milk at dinner and takes the required two bites of all items on her plate. She feeds the rabbits every day without being asked.

Sejal and Raj just seem to need me more than Jayne. I wonder, do they notice? Does it bother Jayne? Will it bother her someday? Am I a terrible mother for not making more of an effort to give her my attention as much as the others? Do I tell her often enough how fantastic she is or do I take it for granted?

Today was costume day at her ballet class. I was required to be there to listen to the teacher's instructions about hair and make up, rehearsal times, photos, recital tickets and make sure the costume fit properly.

Surprisingly, Sejal and Raj sat quietly in the corner of the dance studio and read books and colored. I was able to completely focus on Jayne... and she took my breath away. I noticed the way she giggled with her fellow dancers in the corner as they lined up. I noticed her concentration and near perfect ballet lines. I saw the twinkle in her eye when she saw me watching her and taking her picture. I saw brief flashes on the tiny, spunky toddler she used to be and the poised woman she will become all at the same time.

As she changed out of her costume, I told her how much I love being her mom. "Why?" she asked. "Because you take my breath away," I said. "Um, OK," she answered, "can I pick what we have for dinner?" I let her pick (Chipotle) and I did not ask if she would change her mind when Raj said he wanted something different. "It's Jayne's choice tonight," I said firmly.

My sweet Jayne. She's a good kid. A really good kid.

Parenting In Front of the Plumber

2010-05-02T22:20:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow will be a crazy day. There will be several workmen in my house all day. I'm kind of over it. The other day my Facebook status read, "Grumpy. Cold. SO tired of having random workmen in my house all day long."

My friend Alicia responded with, "I bet they go home and say -- Grumpy. Cold. SO tired of being at that random woman's house all day long. :)" which cracked me up.

And yet it does have it's benefits. I wrote about it over here a little while ago.

Don't Talk About Blogging on Your Blog

2010-04-20T22:58:00.000-07:00

I realize the first rule of coming back after taking an unintentional, extended blog break is don't take about your unintentional, extended blog break.

Oh well.

So I took an unintentional, extended break from writing on this little blog. Almost every day I would sit down at the end of the day to write something. Exhaustion and an endless list of things to do would get in the way. I've been reading lots of blogs, but haven't been commenting. Basically I checked out. But I just can't quit you. I miss writing. I miss my blog.

Settling in to our newly remodeled home has been a sloooooow process. Things are moving along though and we are so happy. It may seem silly to some to feel so emotionally attached to a house, but I know that we were meant to raise our family here. It's been worth it. I just want to get to a point where I am not walking around constantly taking notes in my head of things that still need to be fixed/finished.

Yesterday we hit a big house remodeling milestone. This was my driveway in the morning.

And this was my driveway in the afternoon.

The kids cheered as the port-a-potty was carted away.

Progress.

If the electrician does not show up tomorrow to hang the rest of my light fixtures... heads will roll.

A Teaser

2010-04-02T22:44:00.000-07:00

I know. I know. Everyone wants to know if we are happy to be back in our house and how it's working out. Everyone wants photos.

We are thrilled to be back. There are countless things that I love about this house and after spending 10 months remodeling it, it's even more lovable.

Except it's not quite finished yet. I spend my days with at least one, but usually four or five workmen finishing up all kinds of projects. Not all the windows have latches, several light fixtures haven't arrived yet and only two out of five bathrooms have toilets and only one bathroom has a faucet. I am surrounded by blue painters tape.

And my living room still looks like this.

Yeah. We still have a ways to go before we are ready for a photo tour. But here is a picture of my kitchen island that is bigger than my queen sized bed. I measured.

I posted today...

2010-04-01T10:07:00.000-07:00

April Fools.

Moving Day

2010-03-21T21:27:00.000-07:00

I'm never doing this again. You never realize how much stuff you really have until you have to pack it all. We are moving back into our newly remodeled house on Tuesday. That leaves me a little over 24 hours to finish packing all of our belongings. It'll be a mad dash, but I'll make it.

We will be living in a house that is still missing a few light fixtures and a couple of toilets among other random things like cabinet pulls and a garbage disposal. I am keeping my fingers crossed that we will have appliances and hot water by the end of the day on Tuesday. But we'll make the best of it. We are moving back. Hooray!!

Living in an incomplete house is not what has been keeping me up at night for the past few days though. I'm wondering if it would be possible to wrap three small children in bubble wrap so they don't leave a trail of fingerprints on my freshly painted walls. Would it be too much to strip them down and hose them off each time they enter the house?

I vacillate between accepting the fact that we have young children and young children can be brutal on a house and children need to be taught to respect their home and not touch anything, ever. The problem is that my husband is firmly in the hose them off before they enter and wrap them in bubble wrap camp. Little scratches on the floor, a spare shoe out of place or a chocolate smudge on the couch kind of stress him out.

He can laugh about his perfectionist tendencies. Sometimes. He's aware of the fact that there will be mishaps and kids are just that... kids. However, it's going to be a rough first few weeks.

Now if someone can please tell me how to get sticky hand marks off the wall I would be forever grateful. I am not sure how much of our deposit on this rental house we will be getting back.

I Am a Parenting Genius. Period.

2010-03-11T22:24:00.001-08:00

Today, after 7+ years of parenting, I have figured out the secret to getting kids to eat their dinner no matter what you serve. And lucky you, I'm going to share the secret with you.

First, be sure to pack them a lunch that is just mediocre. Do not include their favorite foods, just a standard sandwich, some fruit and a few other items.

Then schedule four or five after school activities. For example, International Day assembly rehearsal, soccer practice, art class and throw in a cooking workshop too just for fun. Make sure it's your day to carpool so you tack on an extra 15 minutes to your drive time as well. Use the 20 minutes of time between school and dinner to do homework. Give them a graham cracker and perhaps a strawberry or two. Do not pack any snacks other than water and gum to chew on as you drive around all over the great Bay Area to enrich you kids childhood.

When you finally roll back into your driveway, explain to the children that you know they are starving and you will get dinner fixed as soon as possible. Be sure that the item they are least likely to eat is ready first. This is a great time to serve green beans, broccoli or even the dreaded asparagus or brussels sprouts. As you serve the rest of the meal, marvel at the amount of food your eats like a bird son puts down in one sitting.

To recap: serve a crappy lunch, starve them all afternoon and distract, distract, distract. Then serve a healthy dinner. Voila!

You're welcome.

Lessons from our weekend in the snow

2010-03-03T10:57:00.000-08:00

When you rent a car without a DVD player for a 3+ hour drive, a half hour into the drive is not a good time to send out a request on Facebook for ideas to entertain your kids in the car. Your husband will not take you seriously when you ask him to turn around so you can run into the library for some books on CD.
Snow covered trees and mountains are gorgeous and peaceful and winter wonderland-ish. Grimy, exhaust covered snow on the side of the highway is not gorgeous, peaceful or winter wonderland-ish.
When your four year old son says, "open your mouth and close your eyes, now crunch" it's not a good idea to follow his instructions.
Hot cocoa and a fireplace is a combination that is near perfection.
If you decide to let all five cousins share a room, prepare a backup plan for when they are still awake at 3am playing with zhu zhu pets.
When it's your sisters night to cook, be sure to tell her not to be offended when your kids turn their noses up at her tortilla soup. Then watch in amazement as your kids literally devour her soup.
When your brother-in-law says he's going on one more ski run, he really means he's going on five more ski runs.
Your four year old son will throw a fit right after lunch and tell you he is DONE skiing. You will then change his shoes and take off most of his gear. Fifteen minutes later he will be begging you to get back out of the slopes and you will gear him back up. Repeat several times.
Skiing requires a lot of stuff. A lot of stuff times three kids is kind of a nightmare.
Night time sledding and snowman building is a great way to tire out a bunch of cousins. But they will still be up at 3am playing zhu zhu pets.

I have the best family. I'm sure yours is great, but trust me, mine is fantastic.

Allergic to Babies

2010-02-23T16:31:00.000-08:00

An actual conversation that took place in my minivan at 2:30pm this afternoon:

My four year old son: Mom, how do they get babies out of your tummy?

Me: Ummmmm, either they come out of the v.agina or the doctor makes a cut at the bottom of the belly and takes the baby out.

Son: Which way did I come out, a cut or the other way?

Me: The doctor made a cut and took you out.

Son: *whinces slightly* Which way did Jayne and Sejal come out?

Me: The same way, the doctor made a cut and pulled them out one at a time.

Son: Did it hurt?

Me: No, not really.

Son: Did it hurt a little?

Me: Well it mostly hurt afterward, but not too bad.

Son: I'm glad I'm not a girl. Boys can't have babies in their tummy right? If Jayne or Sejal every get a baby in their tummy, I'm leaving this family. I'm allergic to babies.

Me: Well OK then.

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My mother-in-law once took him to meet her friends newborn grandchild and he refused to even enter the house. He sat on the front steps. When they brought the baby outside, he asked if he could wait in the car. It's a good thing he is the baby of the family, because the kid really does not like babies.

Joy to Renee!

2010-02-17T22:11:00.001-08:00

This following post was meant to go up this morning. I wrote most of it yesterday afternoon. But then my daughter got sick and my kitchen floor was incredibly sticky for some reason and needed to be mopped and the mother's club newsletter needed to be edited, etc., etc., So although I'm late to the party, my sentiments are no less genuine.

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This past July I had the good fortune to meet a blogger named Renee in Chicago at BlogHer. We shared several meals, lot of laughs and great conversations during those two days and I am so happy to call Renee a friend. Her blog is as warm and heartfelt as she is in person.

Renee has a daughter, Bunny, and will soon be traveling to Ethiopia to pick up a new addition to her family. I've read with great anticipation as Renee and her husband wait to finalize the adoption of a little boy, Lion. This post expresses so well what she feels as she waits to bring her son home. It's beautiful. So let me offer my sincere congratulations to you and your family Renee. I can't wait to read all about your transition from a family of three to a family of four over the next few weeks and months.

Today the lovely Issa has organized a virtual baby shower of sorts for Renee. Issa and several others have already covered what it's like to bring home a baby boy as opposed to a baby girl. Yes, they are loud. Yes, they bang things. A lot. And yes, your home will soon be filled with things like this:

But I want to tell you about what really took me off guard the day my son was born. See, during the years that my girlfriends and I were all newly married and without children we had many, many discussions about our mother-in-laws. What is it about mothers and their sons we'd wonder. We'd share stories and debate whose mother-in-law was the wackiest.

Well, when I was pregnant for the second time I wanted a girl. So badly. I already had two girls. I knew how to be a mom to girls. My house was full of pink and frill. It had to be a girl.

But then they held the little baby up and my husband announced, "it's a boy!!" And after I saw for myself that he wasn't joking, I felt like I won the lottery. In that moment I knew exactly why mother-in-laws are so nutty. No one would ever be good enough for my son.

So yes, boys are messy. And I'm still surprised by how much more physical my son is than my girls. His hugs can literally knock me over. And yes, boys are loud and they pee everywhere. But then there are the moments like today when my son was outside playing and suddenly ran in to give me this.

Um, please try to ignore my horribly dry skin and nails that seem to be screaming for a manicure.

Renee, I wish you many, many moments like this. I know them moment you hold Lion in your arms, you'll fall in love.

Curiosity Killed the Cat

2010-02-15T00:01:00.000-08:00

I spent most of Valentine's Day hushing my children while my husband stayed in bed nursing a cold. We went out for bagels and smoothies, did some homework, made heart shaped brownies and homemade marshmallows and I finally resorted to TV to keep them quiet while I cleaned up the sticky, sugar coated kitchen.

So when my sister called and invited us over for pizza, I was happy to have an excuse to take the crew out of the house. The drive up to her house is normally just over an hour. Traffic was a b*#$% getting through San Francisco on this Valentine's Day/Chinese New Year. It took me an extra 45 minutes or so with three squirrelly kids in the car.

The pizza was yummy, the heart shaped brownies were perfection and the kids has lots of laughs. After dessert I put them all in their pj's and headed home. I was hoping the kids would nod off as they usually do on the way home from my sisters and I would get an hour to be alone with my thoughts.

That was the idea anyway. The plan was to put of some classical music, enjoy the drive over the Golden Gate Bridge and write a blog post in my head. But my daughter had other plans. She was not tired. At all.

So instead of an hour of peace and classical music, I had an hour of this:

Mommy, when I'm in high school, what grade with my cousins be in?

Mommy, can we trick or treat with just our family next year, there were too many people to keep up with last year?

Mommy, will Daddy be awake when we get home?

Mommy, how deep is the ocean? Is it as deep as an elephant? Is it as deep as The White House? How do you know?

Mommy, my stomach feels funny and my throat hurts?

Mommy, I am sitting still and looking out the window and my stomach still feels funny?

Mommy, how many more years will Obama be president?

Mommy, I am sitting still.

Mommy, what are we doing tomorrow?

Mommy, why did you say curiosity killed the cat!! That is mean!!!

Mommy, how many years is high school? How many years is college?

Mommy, where is Vancouver?

And on, and on, and on.

So you can thank Sejal for this post.

Sunday's Simple Pleasures XX

2010-02-14T00:01:00.000-08:00

I believe in homemade Valentines. I make no judgements if you go the store bought route. Really I don't. I have vivid memories of sitting at my kitchen table as a kids surrounded by red construction paper, heart shaped doilies, markers and paste. Doing crafty things with my kids usually makes me want to run and hide, but Valentines should be homemade. It's the law in my house.

Thus:

Now I also believe in the kids actually doing the work of the homemade valentines, and for the most part, I was very hands off. My son has 42 kids at his school and apparently writing his name and stamping little hearts for about 10 of these was about all he could handle.

Happy Valentine's Day!

We got the ideas for our valentines here, here and here.

*I started Sunday's Simple Pleasures to highlight the simple things in my life that bring me joy. I believe one of the keys to overall happiness is learning to appreciate little things that bring you comfort and delight. You can see my entire list so far here.

Edgy

2010-02-07T22:10:00.000-08:00

That is how I've felt for the past week or so. Edgy. It's not one thing specifically, it's lots of things.

One of which is my house. We moved out last May and were supposed to be back in January, then that got bumped to March. Now, realistically, we'll move back toward the end of March... hopefully.

I've been very zen about the whole thing for the past nine months. I no longer feel zen and patient. I want my house back. I want to walk to school again instead of drive 10 minutes. I want my yard. I want my new kitchen and my walls painted in colors I chose instead of white. Everywhere I turn in this rental house is white, white, white. And temporary. I'm overwhelmed with all the details left to be decided, like cabinet pulls and door knobs and we need a new door bell.

Then I get pissed at myself, because why can't I just be grateful and it's only a few more weeks. I'm lucky to have a home that I love that will be amazing in just a few more weeks. Thousands of peoples homes crumbled to ground in a matter of seconds. Perspective. It all makes me edgy.

But it's not just the house though. It's a lot of things.

Sometimes motherhood feels like an assault on my senses. The noise and chaos three kids can create overwhelms me at times. My children sometimes literally slam themselves into me. And lately, they hit sharp edges instead of soft and comfort. A mother should be soft and comforting. But I'm edgy and prickly. I snap and yell and grimace. I have not been comforting.

Tonight as I had all three of them in the bathtub, something shifted. I felt myself relax just a little bit. There was no watershed moment, or sweet story to tell about my kids teaching me to just enjoy the moment of three kids playing nicely in a bubble bath.

I just simply realized that all I can do is take things one moment at a time. We will eventually move back into our house. All the other things bothering me will work themselves out. They always do. The edges are starting to soften and this too shall pass.

What I have not been writing about

2010-02-02T23:00:00.000-08:00

Every day in the shower or while I'm waiting for someone to finish basketball or ballet class, I write blog posts in my head. At the end of the day I sit down to write them after the kids go to bed. By the time I answer a million emails, chat with my husband and read blogs, I'm waaay too tired to write anything and I go to bed with grand plans to write the next day. Am I the only one who does this?

Anyway, here's what I have not been writing about lately.

My birthday gifts. I really don't care that much about gifts. I actually would prefer not to get gifts, I always feel a little unworthy. It doesn't help that I am a terrible gift giver. I try, I really do, but I usually end up getting my poor husband socks and underwear for Christmas or a new shirt that doesn't fit him and my friends get gift cards. This year my 76 year old mother took my kids shopping for a gift for me and what they came home with was hilarious. Let's just say that I will be wearing ice blue dearfoam slippers and a hot pink short sleeve nightgown with ruffled sleeves for a while. I mentioned to my husband that I could use a new watch. I even went so far as to send him a couple of pictures of watches I liked. He ended up getting me this one, which seriously is way nicer than any photo I sent him. He continues to kick my @ss in the gift giving department. I'd love him even if he got me nothing, but the watch is perfection. Thank you honey.
My son's hair!!! Oh my gosh. All of my kids were born with a full head of hair and had their first haircuts around 9 months old. I've been able to manage my daughter's haircuts with no problem. I can clearly explain what I want their hair to look like to whoever is cutting it and it always turns out just fine. My son on the other hand? I am afraid I have completely failed him. He has had maybe one or two good haircuts in his life. I cannot explain to anyone what I want it to look like and he always looks a little strange. I look at other little boys and wonder why my son can't get a decent haircut. I finally had his hair in a semi-satisfactory style and then my mother-in-law cut his bangs. And OH MY GOD he looked the little boy on the Dutch Boy Paint can. It was bad. I took pictures. It's been fixed by a professional, don't worry. But it still isn't exactly how I want it to look.
Why am I the last person on earth to discover a flat iron? I've owned one for over a year, but just recently took it out of the box. Hello!?! It has changed my life.
I'd love to be able to update you again on my house, but there hasn't been much change. I want to move back so bad I could scream. I am 75% sure that we will make it back by the March 1st deadline. But every day that I stop by and the painters haven't started and the counters still are not installed it dwindles down a percentage point or two. If there isn't some progress in the next few days, head will roll.
I am 33 days into my Project 365. Hooray for me! You can see the photos here. Some of them are actually decent. I am no where near a professional photographer and have no idea how to really use my fancy camera. But the whole experience so far has forced me to capture moments that would I otherwise would have forgotten all about.

Now that I've got all that off my chest, maybe I can sleep. I'm sure I'll write another stellar blog post tomorrow morning in the shower. Or maybe not.