Friday morning I opened my computer in the midst of making coffee, fixing breakfast and packing lunches. I just wanted to see what was on the hot lunch menu, but took a quick glance at my email. A message from a blog friend caught my eye. The title was, "our friend Anna's son."
I opened it and what I read made my heart fall into my stomach. Anna's son had died unexpectedly. Her smiling, sweet 12 year old son. It's just too awful to even think about. The pit in my stomach and heavy hearted feeling stayed with me the whole day. I had to fight tears when another mom at school simply asked me, "how are you?"
I must admit that it felt a little strange to be so heartbroken over the loss of a boy I never knew, to want so badly to make it not true for a mom I know only through my computer screen. I didn't even tell my husband about it. Not because he wouldn't understand, because he would. More because I knew he would tell me that there really is nothing I can do from all the way across the country. He would tell me to stop looking at her blog, stop trying to think of just the right words to type, stop asking yourself why her, why a 12 year old boy who just started 7th grade?
But I can't stop. Anna can't just look away from the terrible pain that has enveloped her family. She can't just shut the computer screen and continue to pack lunches. And even though I have never met her in person, I care about her and I am heartbroken for her.
Other have expressed this sentiment much more eloquently than I have here. This and this are beautiful and just, yes. Please pray for Anna and her family.
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7 comments:
So, so true.
In blogging, we come into each other's lives through a comment. We make each other laugh and reflect, and we become friends.
The grief is unimaginable.
I wish we all lived closer to each other.
And I feel a responsibility to share a sliver of the pain too--for this very reason, because she has no choice.
It's just unfathomable. I still keep thinking it must somehow not be true. x
So beautiful Kirsten. I wish we all lived closer to each other too. I know that she is feeling our of prayers and thoughts and hopefully they are helping her and her family.
xo
Heartbreaking ... and so true. And worse, that there really isn't anything we can do to help her.
Missing you - and hoping we can all reconnect again next summer in NYC.
Group hugs abound! xxx
I haven't said it to anyone either. No one understands but you guys.
Hugs to you friend.
The grief really is too much to think about. I have thought about her every day since hearing the devestating news and I am amazed and how she's been holding up. No mother should ever have to experience what she has had to go through. And we are all united, in one way or another, through the blogosphere - I very much believe this.
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